


Ambrosial

by Naveri



Category: Purple Hyacinth - Ephemerys & Sophism (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Aphrodisiacs, Begging, Bella Initiates Lauki, Blowjobs, Bonding, Dom!Lauren, Every Chapter Is Smut, F/M, Feels, Fingering, Foreplay, Hot Spice, Hot Steamy Goodness in the Archives, I write these at 4AM, Intimacy, Kieran is again suffering, Lauki has healed by this point sorta, Lauren vibe checked Kieran's dick, Masturbation, Painful Mornings, Romance, SIMP!Kieran, Sexual Activity on the Job, Steamy activities on Kieran's couch, Steamy activities on Kieran's desk, Switch!Kieran, Torturing Kieran, Vaginal Sex, Zephyr (Mentioned) - Freeform, infirmary shenanigans, slip and slide, spicy af
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:07:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26301658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naveri/pseuds/Naveri
Summary: Kieran and Lauren stumble out of a near death escape from Bella after a Lune mission goes severely wrong.However, this time Bella wasn't equipped with her deadly poison. It was something drastically worse.Now these two fools will have to deal with the consequences, but how long can they go on before they both fall to their desires?
Relationships: Lauren Sinclair/Kieran White
Comments: 48
Kudos: 165





	1. Archives are for organizing, not disheveling.

**Author's Note:**

> We can thank Bella for this.
> 
> Warning: MATURE, SEXUAL CONTENT PLEASE LEAVE NOW IF YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH THAT. Also, let's imagine that these two have gotten over their differences (somewhat) and are on balanced equal terms (to an extent). Kieran still hates himself.

Kieran released the most exhausted sigh of a lifetime. Worn shoes dragging along the pavement. Coated in mud from the trek away from the Grim Goblin, and soaked from the splash up. Sprinting out of Bella’s grasp wasn’t the smartest idea he had. Normally, he wouldn’t have done that. The red-headed Officer trudging ahead of him had his brain improvising on the spot. Bella and Lauren in the same room was the one thing he _never_ wanted. Now they had to deal with the consequences. Bella may have found this funny, but for these two, it was far from pleasant. Despite feeling so good right now, he wanted to slit his own throat. 

“How long until this shit wears off?” Lauren’s voice was parched from running and he could tell she had been fueling herself on her normal schedule of sleep every two days for two hours. The absolute mad woman. 

He coughed, clearing his throat without expressing anything else that dared conjure up within him. “Well, Bella’s aphrodisiac is a strange one. If you haven’t had it in your system before, it could last over 24 hours.” 

She halted, her coat whipping up as she turned on her heel. _Ah yes, that angry viper expression of hers._ Lauren’s golden eyes shimmered in the moonlight, radiating with _frustration_ and a harrowing terrifying anger. Kieran had to mentally yell at his body to stay down, his cock twitching in his pants. _For fuck sake, the effects are only just beginning. I need to get out of here._ _If Lauren’s angry energy is making my body fizz, I don’t want to stick around to see her smile._

He made sure to keep his coat buttoned up, completely concealing himself. He raised his hands in defense, giving her his signature sloppy smile and treading past her. “I have only been under her aphrodisiac once before. Let me tell you, this time is already much more enjoyable. It lasted a while. A day or so. Let’s just split at the bridge and head home. I think that’s our best course of action here.” He didn’t dare show his face as he kept walking. The faster he could get home the better. 

“No, we split up here. I can’t deal with you right now.” Lauren growled, briskly pacing past him without as much of a glance.

 _Okay, she was upset with him. It was kind of his fault that they ended up in this predicament. A story for another time. When he could think with his brain, not his cock._ Kieran shook his head, fuzzy tingles creeping along his spine and down to his toes. He watched Lauren’s red rays flip in the wind, her silhouette slowly disappearing from view. He took a deep breath and chuckled to himself, “Time to survive the night.”

_Work was going to be fun._

* * *

**Early the Next Morning**

Lauren didn’t sleep. Resorting to tossing and turning, among other things if it helped rid of the rising need to find some kind of relief. Lauren groaned, staring at her clock. It was hardly 4:00 AM, but she was ready to leave and just head to the office. No one would be there to bother her yet, and she’d have plenty of work to distract her. She quietly got ready, sneaking out the front without alerting Lucy or her Uncle, and taking in a deep lungful of the cold winter air. It felt good to feel cold somewhere, because currently her entire body was on fire. _Focus, Lauren._ She reached the Precinct, heading inside, and trudging down the hallway without any notice. This gave her at least an hour or so to get some work done, calm herself down, and prepare for the day. Running on no sleep was one thing. Running on no sleep on the effects of an aphrodisiac however, that posed a new challenge for her. _Mark that off the bucket list._

Lauren reached for the handle, opening the door with a sigh, sitting down was going to feel better than standing. She’d hope. Lauren froze as she entered the room. There stood Kieran, who happened to be sipping coffee as their eyes locked. He spit the coffee out in surprise, quickly grabbing a napkin to tap at his lips and chin. Lauren gulped, her eyes honing in on every single movement he made. Kieran’s lips were coated in sugary goodness, a soft smile present as he moved the napkin.

“L-Lauren. I wasn’t expecting anyone else to be here so early.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

They both spoke up at the same time. “I couldn’t sleep.”

Kieran sighed, placing his coffee mug down and sitting slowly upon the desk. “Right, sleep...ahem. Sleep wouldn’t be very easy right now.” 

Lauren was still frozen in place, jaw locked shut, her eyes elsewhere but his gaze. Something in her was gnawing away at her control. Her gaze finally caught his again and sparks of energy tingled through the air. “I need some things from the archives.” Her feet moved for her, turning away from him to leave the room. 

* * *

Kieran watched her go, just as she did earlier this morning. He could sense how uncomfortable she was around him. He certainly couldn’t blame her. To think they had the same idea of coming here so early was surprising. Kieran was reluctant to even show up today, continuously yelling internal monologue to his dick to stay down. He straightened his glasses, his mind already wandering back to when he was in his apartment. He couldn’t even count the amount of times he tried to jerk one out before he felt spent. 

_I’m going to go mad by the end of the day and my dick will fall off before it’s over._

It was even worse that the only thing racing through his mind was _her._ Lauren. Lauren. Lauren. Why couldn’t his mind conjure up someone else the moment his hand gripped his base. Why was it that it had to be her long legs invading his mind. The way she sauntered around with that gun strapped to her hip. That same gun which always found its way against his head. 

_Even that has me going, right now._ He gripped the desk roughly. Taking a deep breath, he tried to calm the growing bulge tightening around his pants. 

_And why did she have to look at me with those pensive eyes of hers, right before leaving._ Something struck him. She hadn’t come back. Her look could be mistaken for conniving. _No, that’s not possible._ He gulped down the rest of his coffee, pushing up off the desk and striding out toward the archives. The door was slightly open and hesitation crept up. Was he about to regret this? 

His hand flattened against the frame, pushing it to peek inside. “Lauren, are you alright?” He was grabbed by the arm, and the door slammed shut behind him. A click of a lock was heard and he narrowed his eyes in confusion. His gaze drifted to Lauren who was staring back with a ferocious stare. “Kieran.” Her words barely a whisper. “I can’t handle this anymore. It’s agonizing.” 

“Lauren, maybe you should just go home. I’ll let Hermann know you weren’t feeling well.” He cleared his throat, stepping back as her form closed in on him. He never felt more like prey in that moment. His feet came to a stop as it brushed against the legs of a chair. She reached him, her jaw tightening, fists in a ball, feet planted firmly upon the ground. _Was she about to beat the shit out of me for her own pleasure?_

He placed his hands up in defense, waving the imaginary white flag. “Lauren, I don’t think fighting in the archives is exactly professional. I also don’t want a second pair of glasses to be broken.”

Lauren planted her hands on either side of the desk, which was now a victim of the chair crushed against it thanks to Kieran’s ass. 

Lauren sighed in frustration. “Stop. Just…” She turned her head away, clearly battling with herself. Kieran panicked. She was too close. “Lauren, please. It’s better if we...give each other some space right now.” A quiet, tantalizing whisper left her sweet lips. “Just...make it stop.” 

He swallowed the heaviest and last bit of saliva from his throat. He didn’t move, his hands still in the air and a shiver rolling down his spine. “I can’t.” He admitted quietly, grabbing her wrist that kept him trapped against the chair and snaking his way out of her cage. “Lauren, you're not thinking properly. I’ll be sure to let the others know you were ill. Go home.” 

Lauren's hand gripped the top of the chair. Her eyes back on him. Wildfire flicked over her expression. The screech of the chair echoed through the room, Lauren slowly pushing it toward the door. It fit snug beneath the door handle and again Kieran swallowed.

“Lauren ---” 

“I have tried everything, Kieran.” His name was practically a whimper escaping her, those luscious hips swaying over to the desk. She turned, sitting down on it. She brought her hands to her head, fingers rippling through her red locks. 

He wanted it to be his fingers. Desperately. 

_No._

“Listen to me, Lauren.” He was rigid in more than just his stance, turning away from her to hide the ever growing tent pitching itself. “There are still too many things I regret doing to you, and I promised I wouldn’t touch you. In any capacity.”

“Kieran, it’s been well over a month since our _indifference._ Do me this favor. Please.” She practically pulled her hair out, hands again gripping the desk. 

Finally, he turned. Having composed himself enough. “Why me? Because I’m the only one here?” 

She gave him a deadpan expression. “No.” Adjusting herself, he could tell she was feeling extremely uncomfortable. He hoped it wasn’t because of him. “I know you’re suffering too.” 

He looked up in surprise. Catching the truth fluttering over her eyes. He had an idea that she may have caught on to his meaning when he said there was another time on the aphrodisiac. “That isn’t for you to fix.” 

Lauren slammed her fist on the desk. Kieran flinched, staring at her again. “God damn it, Kieran. Just---fix _our_ problem.” 

His heart pounded against his ribs and again the rising heat boiling in his stomach was at the forefront. He knew whatever he decided next, she was going to hate him regardless. He stepped forward in just a few strides and Lauren shrunk, that dominant energy withering away the moment he shadowed her like a cloak. 

“Fine, darling. I will fix _your_ problem. I promise you that.” 

Lauren’s gold pleading eyes gazed up at him. He chuckled at her, the tips of his fingers electrifying once they reached the soft parts of her cheek. His warm hand gliding along her jaw. He saw her eyes flicker to his lips. The silence of the room crowded them, their breaths mingling as he inched closer. 

_She drove him mad._

This was something he thought about a lot. 

_But never this way._

He needed to break the ice if they were going to get through this. “My, my officer, how scandalous of us.” He laughed and she smiled, arching her back to further meet him as they closed in. Their noses barely an inch away. His hand tangled in those soft fire locks, the sweet smell of the morning air and a hint of floral scents invading his nostrils. He guided the back of her head toward him, turning his head ever so slightly. He licked his lips subconsciously and froze, as did Lauren. His tongue had rode over her sweet tantalizing reddened lips. Lauren pushed up, crashing them against him. They groaned simultaneously, her hands gripping to his suspenders to tug him closer. His body roughly pushed against her hips, legs already spread for him. Her calves tightly pulled him closer. He moved in motion, kissing her with all the passion he had pent up from the moment they had met. Tongues tangled among one another, his left hand caressing over her arm, coated in goosebumps. 

The enchanting moans coming from the woman beneath him sent his mind far over the edge.

_She’s going to hate me after this. Just enjoy it now before you get your ass beat._

His teeth caught her bottom lip, barely tugging away. Her hands viciously roaming along his shirt and caressing over the buttons.

He spoke against her sweet breath. “Lauren, are you su--”

Her hand reached for his ponytail and she tugged. “Shut up, Kieran. Do as you promised.” 

That dominating viper was back, her hands roaming down over his neck to the first button on his shirt. She popped it off with ease, guiding her finger to the next. Kieran stilled between her legs, their eyes meeting as she continued. Each pop of a button accelerating his heart. Her fingers sprawled widely against his bare chest. His smirk was apparent, the feeling of just her touch would have him hook, line and sinker. She noticed his expression, tightening her thighs around him to grind against his impending doom. He let out a gasp, an uncontrolled moan releasing from him. Lauren released a small laugh, loving the sight of him being so weak to her every move. 

“Officer, I thought I promised to fix _your_ problem.” His hands trailed under her thighs, gripping them tightly and scooting her further onto the desk. She yelped at the movement, gripping onto his suspenders. He laughed, a devilish grin flashing at her. Kieran’s lithe fingers reached for the buttons on her pants, popping them off slowly. Lauren squirmed, her heel digging into the back of his thigh.

“We don’t have all the time in the world, _Archivist.”_

He gave a sheepish smile, ripping the rest of the buttons off in one swoop. She gasped in shock, watching as the buttons flew into the air, bouncing onto the ground and rolling away underneath the shelves. 

“My apologies, Officer. I’ll have to replace those, later.” 

“You assho---” Lauren fell silent with a moan, Kieran pushing his hips against her. His form towered over her, his fingers still present near the radiating heat she had attempted to please one too many times within the last few hours. She caught his gaze and lifting her hips, his hands easily tugging the pants down past her knees. The aching knot growing in her stomach increased, feeling all of _him_ so close against her. Kieran was greeted with a pair of dark maroon panties. She was soaked, and his pants seemingly too tight for him now. 

A chuckle escaped him. “Mon amour, I don’t think these are helping very much.” Lauren turned away with a blush, her legs closing on instinct. His hands gripped her bare thighs roughly, spreading them apart. “I have a promise to uphold and….” He turned toward the clock on the wall above the door. “Quiet possibly, less than ten minutes to do so.” His smirk widened, a hand gripping the piece of useless clothing and tearing them apart.

Lauren gasped again, a look of utter shock on her face. “Kieran, what the hell!” 

“Once I’m done with you, they won’t be necessary. I’ll make sure you’re satisfied, Lauren Sinclair.” Kieran was already ignoring her protest, his eyes glued to the glistening flower in front of him. _God, she was perfect._ “So the carpet does match the drapes.” 

Lauren again protested, his banter driving her mad. “Do something useful, subordinate.”

Kieran chuckled, hands tickling along the inside of her thighs that were already soaked from her desire. He felt her shiver, her face pointed elsewhere and red as a tomato. Kieran wasted no more time, his fingers sliding along her slit. She gasped, squirming beneath him. He cracked another laugh, “I’ve hardly begun.” 

“Ju--just shut up!” she yelped, his fingers trailing over her again, her anger dispersing into pleasure, that intoxicating moan of hers returning and drilling pleasure deeper into the pit of his stomach. He’d only used two fingers and they were already ripe with her sweet nectar. He let them slide over her bud, her hips thrusting upward again. “Lauren, look at me.” He whispered. 

Her eyes trailed back to him, her flushed expression brightening at the seriousness on his face. The utter enjoyment and pure ecstasy swimming through his icy orbs. They locked gazes and with that his two fingers thrust into her. Kieran would never forget the lust riding over her beautiful face as he began to please her. _Fuck, she was so wet._ He didn’t care that it was from the drug. He knew she’d never be this excited for him, but he was going to enjoy every second of helping her find relief. He stopped and her eyes smoldered into a darkness. Between a plea and a demand left her lips.

“Don’t stop.” 

Kieran kept his charming smirk present, pulling his fingers away and thrusting into her again. Lauren spread her legs wider with each thrust until she was completely open for him. _He had no idea what forces blessed him with this day, it sure as hell wasn’t Bella._ His thumb found its way to her clit, slowly maneuvering over her at an aching pace. Lauren gasped again, her hands reaching to grip his biceps. He let her squeeze him roughly, both of his digits entering into a hellish pace. Slow and rough. His ears, despite the delicious moans coming from the beauty beneath him, listened to the ever ticking clock behind him. He’d make sure she was finished on time. Something hot fluttered inside of him when his name escaped her panting voice. 

“Kieran...please.” 

He was sure he’d end up releasing right then and there if it wasn’t for his strong willed self control. The amount of aching pain between his legs right now was sure to make any man mad, but he made a promise to this red-haired vixen. Kieran stopped, pulling out his fingers now dripping tremendously with her juices. He wasn’t leaving this room empty handed. He brought his fingers to his lips, his tongue gliding over them to taste her. _Sweet fucking heaven._ She was half in a daze, watching him enjoy his little drink. His palm came down, flattening against her hot core. “Are you ready to cum for me, Lauren?” 

“You’ve got two minutes, subordinate.” 

Kieran laughed, “Make that less than one.”

He didn’t give her time to respond, thrusting in three fingers all at once. She widened for him, pure heat wrapping around his digits. He quickened his pace rapidly. Lauren gasped at the power of his ability, her head flinging back in a glistening serene. He drank up every moment of her. His fingers slapped loudly against her, wet and gushing as she dripped all over the desk for him. She was coiling, her orgasm at the apex. He knew she was about to release for him, her walls tightening around his fingers as they drilled into her ruthlessly. Lauren’s hands gripped him roughly.

“Kieran...Kieran I’m so close. Please!”

His other hand fell to her mouth, covering it as she moaned his name loudly. _Gods, if anyone is actually here they would have heard her._ That forbidden excitement had him hard as a rock. She bucked beneath his fingers, riding out the pleasurable waves. He didn’t let up, continuing his pace for her and allowing her to ride them to peace. When her hands finally let go of his arms and she fell limp against the desk, he pulled his now pruney fingers from her, again tasting her delicate sweetness.

After lapping up the juice, he smirked. “That was forty four seconds, darling.”

Lauren was spent, that he could tell. “Shut up.” She had an exhausted smile on her lips, slowly pushing up onto her elbows. “I...don’t know what came over me.” 

Kieran’s heart sank a bit as he saw the usual demeanor of Lauren Sinclair coming back down into reality. “The aphrodisiac is strong. At least you’ll feel a little better for today’s job.” He backed away, turning to give her privacy as she began situating herself. He busied himself with buttoning up his shirt, the sweet smell of her surrounding his senses in a delightful cloud, and he silenced the painful groan conjuring its way up his throat. He just had to somehow get through today. 

“Kieran, what about you?” That hint of pity in her tone. 

“Don’t fret. I’ll be fine.” He took a deep breath, releasing the chair from its hold on the door. A few voices were heard from the hallway and they turned to one another in worry. A tingle of excitement also passed between them, and they both let out a light laugh. She was dressed again, and proper. Minus the buttons he had ripped from her pants. Thankfully, the zipper held them up well enough and her shirt could hide the evidence that was missing. 

“I’ll handle the rest here, you go on ahead.” He gave her a reassuring smile.

She nodded, padding her hands against her pants. “Right.” Passing by him to reach for the door, she stopped. “Kieran.” He found her gaze, hiding away his lust and painful desire.

“This will never happen again.” 

Kieran’s heart sank, but he knew. It was only a fleeting dream. “What will never happen again?” Giving her a small smile, he feigned ignorance, already turning away to open the windows and air the room out. She stood there for a moment, watching him in the basking sunlight. Without another word, she left the room. Kieran would never be able to step foot into the Archives again without these moments invading his mind. He gripped the window seal, taking in the fresh air, a mental mantra trailing over his mind. He’d make just about any sacrifice for Lauren Sinclair. This just happened to be the most agonizing one yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been throwing spicy ideas in my head since the moment I started reading PH. I finally got around to sitting down and writing this. Let me tell you, this was agonizing to me just as much as it was for Kieran. (In a different sense). I have to write sexual content pretty quickly, or I'll lose interest and fall right back into angst. I had to stop quite a few times and re-read to get back into my mind set to finish this. I'll switch between about 50 songs before I find the one right song to get me in the mood to keep typing. We need more hot scenes of PH on here, so I'll definitely be writing more for you guys.
> 
> Please, leave some kudos and/or comment what you think :) Should we give Kieran a break, and make another chapter? Perhaps, Lauren seeing Kieran sulk around the office all day in painful pleasure will have her feeling guilty for 'using him' as her own pleasure. Maybe a prequel to this when Kieran was back at home fantasizing about Lauren? (Kukuku). Let me know what you guys want, I'll be willing to add to the spice.
> 
> (Hears Will retching in the background that it's too spicy)


	2. Donut Holes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kieran tries his best at getting through the day after his delightful morning breakfast in the Archives. That wouldn't last for long when he ends up stuck in another room alone with Lauren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A moment of silence for Kieran White.

Kieran finally managed to leave the Archives and face the battle he was destined to lose. By now, the Precinct was full of busy bodies, and Lauren was only a sweet tender memory left behind; a wisp in the air, left coated upon his fingers. The scent was still present, and he even debated leaving his hands unwashed like the degenerate he was. 

_She was a tasteful breakfast. Who am I kidding, it was practically a limited time sampler and that was the one and only time it was offered. No seconds._

Kieran sighed, trying to keep his body calm. His hands reached for his pocket, fiddling with the fallen warriors; her little buttons. He smirked to himself, imagining how mad she must be that he ruined her favorite pair of pants. 

He knew it was her favorite pair. He also knew he would make it up to her and fix them. A jolt shot through him as Kym’s hand slammed onto his shoulder. He tensed. 

“KIERAN WHITE!” She screeched with joy, her arm slipping into his and prancing down the hall. He was dragged. He didn’t prance. “Good morning, Kym.” 

“Where have you been? I am so used to our new handsome Archivist serving us coffee, I was sad when you weren’t there!”

He gave a nervous laugh, straightening his glasses with two of the blessed fingers. 

_I am not going to make it through today._

“Well, yes. I had some business in the Archives.”

Kym stopped, turning to him and poking her temple. “Oh!? You saw Lauren then? She said the exact same thing.” 

Kieran froze, sweat beading along his neck, palms clammy, and his lip twitching gently. “Uh, oh, yes, Officer Sinclair? She was there for a moment.” 

_A moment of absolute bliss and intoxicating grandeur._

Kym slyly smirked, nudging him in the ribs. “Lauren is cute, isn’t she? Do you think so?”

Kieran laughed lightly, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. Drenched with his own nervousness and painful desire to find a release. God, if he could stop _fantasizing_ about that fire dragon for one moment, he could control himself. “Yes, she is very beautiful. Intimidating though. I best stay away from women like her.”

 _I need to stay away from her before I combust._

Kym snorted, patting his arm. “She does scare off all her dates. But I know a good guy when I see one, and you most certainly could be that guy for her. I’ll be your wing woman.” 

Kieran raised his hands, trying his best not to be offensive. “It’s quite alright Kym, that won’t be necessary...I actually have someone.”

_Why did I have to say that?_

Kym’s face fell with dramatic disappointment. He was sure tears were welding up along her lashes. She heaved, breathing in deeply. “I am...SO SORRY! Of course, you are spoken for. I’m silly. Please, excuse me.” Kym let him go, racing off down the hallway. 

He would call after her, but he had already done enough damage today and it wasn’t even noon. His eyes scanned the area. The coast was clear and no one was around. Kieran blitzed toward the restrooms. He blessed the air that no one else was present, he found himself in a stall, pants already unzipped half down and his cock in his hand. 

_Fuck. Is this what I’ve resorted to today?_

He was harder than he’d ever been. Tip dripping wet, painting the floor with his pre cum. He stood, arching his head back. It made a loud thump against the stall door. Kieran stroked methodically, those three fingers full of Lauren’s scent rubbing over his rigid cock. His adam's apple bobbed, sweat gliding along the crevice of his cheeks, glasses slipping to the edge of his nose. His hand tightened, reaching the tip of his dick and stroking slowly. 

_I just want a release!_

He’d been trying this already for hours since the drug went into effect. Just like before, he was having another mental block and it rigorously built up, only to crash and burn. 

_Just like my partnership with the beautiful, Lauren Sinclair._

“No.” He groaned, stopping himself from thinking about her again. He heaved, calming his breath and tucking away the devil. He zipped his pants, shoes wiping the floor of any evidence that would point to his disastrous deeds. The door to the restroom creaked, slamming shut. Kieran froze, holding his breath.

“Mr. White? I saw you come in here, you weren’t looking too good. Was there anything I could do?” Will’s voice echoed over the stalls. 

_There’s only one person in this Precinct that can help me with this problem._

Kieran cleared his throat, making himself proper and opening the stall door. “Thank you for worrying, but I am fine. I’m not feeling well today, that’s all.” 

Will looked at him in curiosity, stepping back toward the door. “Hmm, Lauren said the same thing. I wonder if you both have come down with something.”

Kieran froze again. _Is this going to be a regular occurrence today?_ Kieran gave his signature fake smile. “I hope Officer Sinclair is feeling alright. I think I just had a bad dinner, that’s all. I’ll be alright soon.” 

Will nodded in approval, waving him off and leaving. Kieran stared at the door to doom, preparing himself for the real test. The real battle that was about to begin. He could only pray Lauren would ignore him, like she does best. 

* * *

Kieran cried internally after washing his hands clean of pleasing an Officer in the Archives. He reassured himself that it was better off this way. If he inhaled her scent anymore today, he’d end up taunting the agonizing build up that never was going to see an end. Bracing himself, he entered the office. You’d think a professional assassin would have nerves of steel, but with his dick in control, suddenly all his skills and efforts flew out the window. 

_There she was._

Lauren was laughing with Kym near her desk. His eyes on impact casted their way to the tight hold of her pants. His brain attacking him with the imagery that she was walking around with nothing beneath. Even more so; he was the only man in this precinct that knew. Grinding his teeth, Kieran turned, facing the coffee maker and donuts. He grabbed the donut, his heated gaze on the hole in the middle. He slowly let his fingers slip through it. Bringing it to his lips; he took a bite. His mind instantly went to Lauren spread for him upon the desk, _his_ fingers coursing in and out of her, causing her to spasm against him. _Sweet, delicate, goodness._

“Is everything alright, Kieran?” Lila was peering at him from her seat at her desk. His eyes widened, almost choking on the donut as he swallowed and coughed. “These donuts are amazing.” 

She agreed, giggling at him. He felt a darkness in the corner of the room, seeing a haunting aura out of his peripheral. 

_Ah, Lukas. He’s a mystery to me._

That certainly helped his cock go back into hiding, appreciating Lukas’s threatening gaze. 

_Should I dare flirt with Lila, just to keep this torture at bay?_

He disregarded the thought. Some battles like this one in particular were never worth dying for. He made quick work with the coffee machine and prepared a few mugs. 

Kieran was merely biding his time before Lauren would leave for her patrol and he could have some less agonizing horny peace. Kym found her way to him, back in her cheerful bubble and smiling brightly. “Our amazing Archivist has come to save the day! I particularly loveeee Kieran’s coffee. It’s so delicious!” She swooned, winking at him. 

_Had she seen right through me when I said I was spoken for?_

Lauren was staring their way. Kieran kept his eyes away from her, feeling the pressure of her presence on his body. 

_It’s so hot in here._

“Kym, would you be a darling and open a window in here? I’ll get the coffee served.” 

She raised an eyebrow. “It’s winter. It’s freezing!” 

Lauren coughed, adjusting herself quickly. “I agree, it’s dreadful in this room. Stuffy.” Kym turned, arching her other eyebrow at her best friend. “Uh...alright. Sure? If the others don’t mind.”

No one else spoke up, seemingly content with the weird energy in the office. Kym was smart, Kieran noticed that quickly. If they weren’t careful, she’d have them both pulled to the side for an interrogation. He presented yet another fake smile. Losing count of how many times today he’d be doing it. Once Kym opened the window, the two of them breathed a sigh of relief in unison, causing the others to turn to them. They froze, staring at one another for a split second. 

“Thank you, Kym.” Kieran coughed, attempting to clear his throat.

Will was watching in suspicion, heading over to the window and closing it.

“If you two are sick, it’s not smart to have the window open. Infirmary. Now.” Will pointed toward the door, crossing his arms at Lauren who refused to move. “I’m not sick. I’m _fine._ ” 

Kieran took this as a getaway, grateful for Will and striding out the door. 

* * *

Kieran sighed, informing the nurse he was just feeling feverish. Thankfully, the nurse had no prior understanding of aphrodisiacs. Lauren walked in shortly after, explaining to the nurse she wasn’t sick. The nurse demanded that both of them lay down and then left the room. 

_Great._

Kieran hoped Lauren’s stubbornness would win out and she’d end up going on patrol. She sat on the bed adjacent to him, her glare that of a snake. “This is your fault, asking to open the window. Will becomes concerned by the slightest thing.” 

Kieran laid back, feet planted up on the bed bars. “My fault? You agreed with me, spitfire, stay in your lane.” Kieran gave her the sass, turning his head away from her before he did something stupid. 

_Again._

She was still for a moment, watching him intently. Kieran’s eyes hovered to his right, the white curtain hiding away the view of the door. He smirked, turning back to Lauren who avoided his eyes when they landed on her. “You know, Lauren. If you’re only going to sit there all pretty, I’ll have to deal with my _ailments_ myself.” 

Her head snapped to him, loose locks of red falling over her flushed cheeks. “What?” 

Kieran grinned, his hand snaking along his chest and finding itself on the bulge in his pants. He watched her jaw tick, that little ferocious gleam in her eyes slowly coming back. “Well, someone _needs_ to be pleased. I don’t care if you are here or not, I’ll still do it.” 

Lauren’s eyes widened as she watched his hand glide between his legs. He stifled a groan, again hard as the fucking planet, beauty of his fantasies sitting innocently in front of him. 

“Kieran, stop.” 

He smirked again, that little questioning tone of hers rolling off her tongue. She wasn’t even sure if she wanted him to stop.

“You’d keep me from this pleasure, Officer?” 

“We’re in the fucking infirmary. So, yes.” She crossed her arms, trying to keep her golden gems off him. 

Kieran chuckled, letting out a retort. “Not what you were saying when we were in the Archives.” 

“That---” Lauren scoffed, still trying to act like the better person. 

“Darling, you got some relief. I however, am quite possibly sure I will die before the day is over.”

She hummed at his response, “Hmm, sounds to me like you deserve that.”

“Ouch, Officer. You hurt me so.” His hand was gripping his dick through his pants tightly, subconsciously biting his lip in thought. 

He was watching her squirm in silence, staring at nothing in particular. 

“Sinclair, come here for a moment.” He smirked again, patting his lap. 

_I’m definitely going to get kicked in the ribs again if I keep this up._

“You would be absolutely insane to think I would fall for your shenanigans.” 

Kieran sat up roughly, groaning at the dull ache between his thighs. 

_May someone have mercy on what soul I have left._

“Would you like me to relieve a little more of your suffering, darling?”

What terrified him wasn’t her contemplating gaze, it was her silence. She abruptly stood, gliding over to him quickly and pulling the curtain further closed around them. “Think you can do it in eight minutes, subordinate?”

Kieran was sure the cheshire grin that grew upon his lips would have scared her off, but he knew Lauren was still feeling _almost_ as frustrated as he was. 

Kieran stood to face her, his chest almost brushing along her breasts. He could feel the carnal heat lapping off her. “Why eight minutes?” his question was coarse and low. 

Lauren straightened to better meet his gaze. “The nurse has a quick lunch break around this time, and you’ve already wasted a solid seven of those minutes.”

Kieran’s snarky laugh was quiet, his breath tickling at the few lost strands of hair bouncing against her pale skin. “It only took me forty four seconds before. What’s to say I’ll need more than that?” 

“Big words from a man who’s practically crippled because of his cock.” Lauren kept her eyes on him, gently plopping down on the bed and sprawling out on it. She moaned, a relaxing sigh escaping the lips he desired to consume. 

“I’d say I’m faring well.” He laughed at himself internally, turning to place a knee on the bed. It creaked from his weight, and the silence of the room became very apparent. Kieran placed his other leg on the bed, now settling himself between the very spot he couldn’t stop daydreaming about. 

“Why are you stalling, get to it subordinate.” 

Kieran’s smile perked to an angle, his soft chuckle rumbling in his throat. Taking off his glasses, he placed them on the table next to them. “Such a demanding woman. If you didn’t know, I like to savor my meal.” 

Lauren gave him a deadpan expression. “I am no---”

His lustful gaze glimmered at her from under his hooded eyes. “Yes. You are.” 

As per the ladies request, Kieran tugged her pants down with ease. “You really should come to work with proper clothing.” 

Lauren’s leg came up to smack him, his right hand stopping the attack and gripping her thigh. He squeezed it tentatively. Using this opportunity, he guided his fingers along her soft pale skin, tickling his way to the road to glory. The already _exposed_ prize. “Officer, coming to work with no panties? How very scandalous.” 

“I swear to god, I will end you when this is all over.” 

_For the love of Ardhalis, just end me after I’m finished here. There was no hope for me anyway._

He hadn’t counted the amount of time they actually had left, leaving it to his imagination that they were about five minutes from being caught and fired. It excited him beyond comprehension. The thrill of making her orgasm in two different areas of the precinct now lit him ablaze. His hot breath unintentionally brushed against the soaking flower between her legs. Lauren yelped, trying to hide her blush. “Are you purposely trying to make me feel embarrassed?” 

“What’s there to be embarrassed about? You are absolutely stunning.” He may have had a hint of sarcasm in his tone, but his words held the truth. Lauren’s hand covered her face, eyes peeking through her fingers to watch him. 

He wanted her to watch him. 

Kieran scooted forward, getting comfortable and raising her thighs to his shoulders. His tongue barely felt the surface of her pussy, and before he knew it he couldn’t stop himself. Lauren’s moans were stifled by the pillow that her head had fallen into. He drank her fully, tongue sliding along the outside and teasing at her clit. 

_I never want anything else, but this._

His cock was twitching at every taste. He hoped he wouldn’t ruin his pants or he’d be stuck here for a while. He was about to make this the most glorious four or so minutes of his damn life. Kieran slowed his tongue to a crawl, carefully licking from bottom to top, her bundle of nerves attacked by the desperate circling of his wet digit. His biceps held her in place, Lauren muffling his name into the pillow. She thrust upward each time he found her clit, which rewarded her with a grin against her dripping flower. He had stopped to admire her drunk passionate expression, which didn’t last. She fluttered her eyes open to glare at him. “If you stop now, you’ll know worse than death.” 

“Officer, threats are just one of my few guilty pleasures. You’ll only make this worse for yourself.” He didn’t bother waiting for her response, his tongue back between her legs. She succumbed to him so easily, thrusting upward again. He had to adjust himself, knees planted on the mattress as he lifted her higher. 

It was time he got serious. 

Kieran gripped her legs tightly, pulling her closer. Her ass off the mattress and pale supple legs, suspended over his shoulders. Finally, he darted his tongue directly into that _sweet delectable goodness_ and drank from the fire goddess. Lauren gasped loudly, hands reaching for him, for anything. He was relentless, feeling the way her heated walls constricted with every thrust of his mouth. His lips and chin, covered in her juices. Quite possibly, his shirt as well. _He didn’t care. He hoped, actually._

“God...damn it, Kieran!” She gasped again, thrusting in his hold. 

He muffled between her legs, squeezing and squishing her thighs. “If I knew any better, I’d say you’re a screamer Lauren Sinclair. It’s unfortunate I won’t find this out. Stay quiet, darling or I won’t be able to finish my job.” He was smirking the entire time, her face a mixture of realization and lust. 

She managed a word. “S-sorry.” 

He went back to the assault on her begging heat, content that she finally gave in to him. His heart pumped, blood racing. They were short on time. He could feel her coming undone. It was a small satisfaction that he already knew her motions after just one orgasm. Her thrusts were becoming rapid. He had to admit, her thighs could crush his skull and he’d be content. Kieran used his strength to keep her in place, practically trapped in her hold. Lauren was drenched, spilling into his mouth and he kept going. Fighting his way to her relief. Her thighs gave one tight squeeze to his face, and a high pitched gasp fell over his ears, followed by the erratic breathing and soft moans she tried to contain. Kieran kept his hold, battling the push of her pussy against his tongue, drinking her all in like it was his last taste of life. 

“Kieran...Kieran…” She rode him hard, thrashing in his arms and bucking along his lips. 

“Mmm, darling. You are splendid.” 

He stopped the moment she relaxed, her arched back falling quietly to the mattress and her thighs slipping from his hold. The scene in front of him was about to be another fantasy he’d only hope would help in his climb over the peak. Lauren’s hair was disheveled, half out of her bun. The white pillow was her canvas, and she was the most brilliant piece of art. His legs, now shaky, slowly released off the creaking mattress. He stood, leaving her lying there in exhaustion and headed for the door. “I’ll stay by the door while you...situate yourself.” 

_More like situate myself._

He licked his lips, her taste wrapped along his mouth and still being savored on his tongue. He used his hand to wipe away at his chin. He’d be covered in her smell, and thus escaping it would be much more difficult this time. His shirt had a few wet spots as well. _I’ll just not wash that one until this hellish sexy nightmare is over._

His cock was fully erect, almost snapping the buttons that were desperately holding on. He knew pain. He knew suffering. But this, this was nothing in comparison. _I’ll end up a eunuch, and live my days as a lonely sap outside of Grey Chapel._ He heard her mumbled thanks, and a rustle of clothing. 

Lauren was about to speak up when he cleared his throat, the door opening and the nurse walking in. “Oh, Mr. White. Are you feeling better?”

_No._

“Yes ma’am.”

“Oh, good. Captain Hermann wants to speak with you in his office.”

“I’ll go there right away.” He didn’t look back, passing by the nurse.

“Mr.White!”

He turned on his heel, clearly impatient to get away from the room. He gave her a questioning glance.

She stuttered on her words, “Your uh…”

_My what!?_

“Your hair. Bed head, perhaps? Maybe find a mirror before seeing the Captain. And um, looks like you may have got a little drool on your shirt there. Haha! It’s okay, you’re not the only one who uses this place as an excuse to sleep.” The nurse bashfully played with a lock of her hair, hands whooshing him away.

Kieran released an internal sigh. “Thank you, Ma’am. I will be sure to clean up.”

Getting through the day was agonizing enough. Making Lauren Sinclair orgasm twice and then dealing with the aftermath, _twice_ was on another level of pure torture. Greeting his Captain with all of this in mind, well. That might as well have been impossible. 

He smirked. “Kieran White, you _are_ the impossible.” 

Or so the Officer would say. And he’d damn well take her word for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALRIGHT ALRIGHT. DON'T THROW TOMATOES AT ME. Listen, look...let me explain...
> 
> Okay yeah, I said Kieran should catch a break and you know, have some relief. But, right before the window incident, something clicked in me. Steamy scenes in the infirmary? I had to do it. SO, YES...Kieran pleasured Lauren (because he's a fucking simp) and she didn't even get to let him know she felt bad. 
> 
> I also am cackling that Kieran is about to go to Hermann's office, and I have a whole scene laid out just for that. Don't worry folks, Kieran is going to have a happy ending. If he survives that long.
> 
> Please leave kudos! and/or comment what you think, more spicy ideas, and if you'd like me to add the prequel (his first incident) and or Kieran before work. I'd like to add both of these to this story. Among other scenes I'll gladly add before their 24 hours are up and the effects wear off and they go back to 'hating' one another.


	3. Breakfast at Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kieran, once again pleasured Lauren and tainted another room in the precinct. None of today's situation helped him prepare for entering Hermann's office and meeting the one person he didn't want to face. 
> 
> Lauren, still feeling guilty about the one sided deal, decides to put her foot down and show him what she can do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ohh, the struggles of being Kieran White.
> 
> And the pleasures.

The massive windows ate up the room, sunlight pooling in and bathing over the three now present within the office. Hermann’s office. Kieran was able to have one more act of despicable quick pleasure in the bathroom, this time without any interruptions. Just enough to calm down and focus. He had to keep his dick at bay if he was going to stand and present himself to the Captain, the very man who’d fire him, and thus would get him murdered because he failed his job as the mole. 

_All because Lauren’s beautiful gorgeous hot dripping soaking intoxicating we..._

_NO STOP._

Hermann cleared his throat, currently shifting through some papers on his desk. He stacked them neatly, pushing them down onto the mahogany with neat precision. 

_Pushing them down onto the desk like I would to Lauren with great delicacy_. 

Kieran attempted to stop his brain, his sexual desires getting the better of him and imagining Lauren in a tight secretary skirt, high heels, legs spread and bent over the wood, looking back at him with considerable desire, want and _need_. Those maroon panties he was beginning to love peeking out and caressing the curves of her cheeks, long milky legs taut and muscular. 

A group of loud voices from outside the office shook him from his stupor, his eyes blinking a few times and a flush rising against the back of his neck. 

Kieran bit his own tongue, attempting to restrain giving the man standing off to the side a show of his cock pitching the circus tent and looking like a foolish clown.

The rattle of the door handle on Hermann’s desk caught his attention, watching him shove them into one of the many _holes_ \---

_For the love of Ardhalis._

Once he was finished, Hermann's distasteful face shined, hands propping up and crossing in front of him. “Mr. White! I’m glad you could come by my office. We haven’t had a chance to properly speak yet in such a manner.”

_Yes, in such a manner that I’m this close to embarrassing myself and leaving the city for good._

Hermann wasn’t the worst of his problems. Things were incredibly more awkward when he first walked in to see Lauren’s Uncle standing off to the side, hands behind his back. He was donned in his professional get-up, clearly here on business. 

_Fan-fucking-tastic._

Hermann's arm extended toward the man. “You have not yet met the Chief of Police, this is Tristan Sinclair.” 

Kieran did his best impression of Lauren’s fake smile, reaching out to shake his hand. Unfortunately, Kieran had to extend his right hand.

_Awkward. My hand was IN YOUR NIECE JUST THIS MORNING._

Kieran’s brain cells rattled around, screaming for escape. 

“It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. White. It’s unfortunate we lost our other Archivist the way we did. Fear not however, we have upped our security and are taking the highest provisions to protect our employees.”

Tristan seemed to shake his hand for much too long, finally breaking and stepping away from him. Kieran’s awesome Lauren expression worked, keeping it plastered to his lips and turning towards Hermann, who seemed utterly delighted to see him. 

_What is with this guy?_

Kieran’s glance toward Tristan also made him shiver, not in a good way. At least, like Lukas, their gazes were helping him cool down and focus on anything but Lauren’s--- _NO._

Hermann stood, slinging around the desk and heading toward Kieran to place a hand on his shoulder. “He’s already done such fantastic work, Chief.” 

Tristan suddenly had the exact same fake smile on his expression, and the chill crept up within the room, temperature dropping as they both glared at one another.

_This is just weird._

“Yes, it seems that maybe the 11th Precinct Police Department may actually have some hope for itself.” 

Kieran blinked in surprise, the detest dripping off his tone. 

_Well, ooookay then._

Hermann coughed, his hand falling from Kieran’s shoulder. “Well, Chief, was there any specific reason you needed to come here besides meeting the new Archivist? That is very unbecoming of you.” 

Tristan didn’t bother answering. “Mr. White, I’d love to chat. _Out in the hallway._ ” 

Kieran blinked a few times. Not sure what to do. He gave Hermann a guilty look.

“Of course, I’ll be right back, Captain.” 

He headed out first, Tristan shutting the door behind him. 

Tristan rubbed the back of his head, turning toward him. “Hermann has a distaste for me, you see.”

Shifting on his feet, Kieran forced a cringe smile. “Um…”

Waving his hands, Tristan placed them in his pant pockets. “Oh, sorry it’s not something you should have to be burdened with. Let me get to the actual reason I’m here. My Niece works in this department. You may have met her already. Her name is Lauren Sinclair.” 

Kieran gulped. He was attempting to keep his mind _off_ of her, and this was throwing a wrench into his horrible plan.

“Oh yes, she is very sweet.”

Kieran’s mind blasted off into the Ardhalis River, parading with the filth where it belonged. 

_So, very sweet._

To keep his nerves from buzzing in excitement once more, he imagined Lauren kneeing him in the ribs, or her beating his ass during one of their spars. His brain picking through the memories of all the bullying and savage words she would spew at him like a broken gumball machine, endless _sweet_ treats, _just for him._

_Yes, so sweet._

“Oh! Now, this may sound very strange. Forgive me, if I am wrong. Lauren has been coming home quite late in the night recently, and out of worry, mind you, I did some digging and heard some rumors of a man fitting your description, being seen with her...late during these nights.”

Kieran froze in place. He was sure time froze in itself, Tristan still as a statue, and that unwavering soft expression on the middle-aged man. _Was he...happy?_ Kieran’s brain went into a fritz. 

_Does that mean he knows we could be Lune? Or what was left of it anyway...had we not been careful enough?_

“Ha-ha-ha. So sorry Mr. Sinclair, I have only just recently met your Niece here in the office. I do hope you figure out who’s been taking her on nightly strolls through the city though.” 

Tristan’s face fell, clearly disappointed. “You seem like a nice man, Mr. White. Sorry for the inconvenience. I thought perhaps I had finally found the mysterious man Lauren was seeing. She keeps so _many_ things from me.” 

“She is her own woman, sir.”

_I want to make her my woman._

_STOP. IT._

Kieran cleared his throat, purely for himself. “Was that all you wanted to discuss?” 

“Yes. I saw your photo in your file and made an improv trip to come and meet you. How silly of me! Haha, well Mr. White. Perhaps your charm could sway Lauren to go out for lunch sometime. God knows she needs it.”

_Is Lauren’s Uncle trying to wingman me right now??_

Kieran pushed his glasses further up his nose, the frames consistently falling from the sweat growing upon his skin. “I’ll um, keep that in mind. It was nice to meet you, Chief.”

Tristan padded his shoulder, waving goodbye and heading down the hallway.

  
  


* * *

Lauren’s eyes bulged, peeking around the corner to see her Uncle and Kieran talking. It seemed like a cringe lighthearted conversation. Tristan turned, heading her way and she bolted, running down the hallway and away from the scene. 

_What were they talking about!?_

_That had to be awkward for Kieran._

Lauren, who was looking back, slammed right into Kym and they both went tumbling.

“OUCHIE, LAUREN! Watch it!” Kym cried, rubbing her forehead. They helped each other up, Lauren sheepishly apologizing. 

Kym clung to Lauren’s hands, bouncing about. “We gotta go on patrol, are you that excited to get out of here? OH! Are you feeling any better?”

Lauren’s attempt at pushing the infirmary incident out of her mind was failing, gulping down the desire that ate her up inside. “The nurse said I didn’t have a fever so I was welcomed to leave.” 

“Ohh? Were you alone with Mr. Hot Archivist in the Infirmary?” Kym snickered, flashing a mischievous grin. 

_Kym, no!_

“I--no. I mean yes. Wait what, he’s not hot.” Lauren crossed her arms, rolling her eyes.

Kym’s sly smirk grew. “Uh, riiight. So, like did you guys talk?”

_We did so much more than talk._

Lauren’s cheeks bloomed with fire, and her eyebrows rising with her embarrassment which shot through the roof of the precinct. 

“Uh, sort of? There wasn’t much talking happening.” She laughed lightly, attempting to find the right words to change the subject.

Will stood further down the hall, speaking to Lukas casually and was in absolutely no hurry. 

“Oh, look it’s Will! Come on, Kym. He’s waiting for us. No time to waste!” Lauren grabbed Kym’s hand, not giving in to any protest as they ran down the hallway. 

* * *

Blessing the winter chill blasting through Ardhalis, Lauren watched her breath clouding up, swirling through the air. Being outside on patrol was great for her body and her mind. She could focus on the job and not _Kieran._ Her mind completely set on making sure the streets were safe. Not thinking about _Kieran’s tongue riding between her legs._

_What am I even saying, I can’t stop thinking about his long fingers, or how good they felt. No! This is purely from the drug, this means nothing. It’s just stupid Kieran, being stupidly charming, and also feeling the effects. Things will go back to normal after tomorrow as if it never happened._

She attempted to settle her mind and convince herself that this wouldn’t change their partnership or their business etiquette, but that little ball of doubt floating in her belly knew that Kieran _wouldn’t ever forget...and neither would she._

They arrived back at the department, preparing to head home or go about their day. Her brain instantly zoned in on finding Kieran, and to no avail he was nowhere to be found. 

“Kym, have you seen Kieran?”

“Oh? Calling him Kieran now? Hehe”

_Shit._

“Uh--”

Kym laughed, clearly having too much fun with the teasing. “I haven’t seen him. I think he went home already, you know he seemed pretty flustered earlier, maybe he wasn’t feeling too good. Probably went to his girlfriend’s house so she could take care of him.” She swooned, hands on her face and giggling.

_What? Kieran has a woman?_

“Girlfriend?”

“Oh! Ah, shoot, yeah he told me this morning...don’t be upset Lauren, I may or may have not tried setting you guys up...BECAUSE I KNOW YOU NEED SOMEONE and then it backfired, he told me he was already taken. So, that failed. I’m sorry, Lauren! I HAVE FAILED YOU!”

Kym dramatically fell over the desk, arms over her eyes as she choked up. Something fluttered inside Lauren’s chest and her breath stuttered.

_Of course, he may have someone. That’s not odd...or maybe just a casual fling he sees from time to time. That’s not strange or out of the realm of possibility._

Lauren bit her lip. Especially in these circumstances, after everything he went through today, and only pleasuring her. He was probably in a lot of pain and suffering from the drug. 

_Then why does it hurt? I shouldn’t be jealous. It’s not like I could give him much of anything in return. I’m hardly capable of what he wants, I’m sure._

“Are you okay?” Kym had stopped being dramatic, her big eyes looking up at her best friend. 

Lauren rubbed the back of her neck, eyes casting toward the floor. “Yeah. I may feel a lot sicker than I thought after coming back from patrol. I should go home and rest.”

“Yeah! Definitely, I’ll see you tomorrow then!” Kym gave her a hug, prancing off to talk to Will. 

* * *

Lauren took her time, embracing the cold and the sound of her heels clicking against the pavement. Her mind wasn’t as muddled with desire when she could breathe in the crisp air. And yet, it still wondered to Kieran. 

_I was foolish to think it was special, naive to think maybe he enjoyed it because he wanted to do it._

Lauren’s regrets began to swarm her. She did kind of force him to help her out and he felt obliged after everything. Kieran was acting as a real subordinate these days out of the fear of hurting her. Her feet stopped. Hands in her pocket, heart racing, and her mind screaming at her. 

“What am I even doing.” She sighed, crossing the street and heading toward the edge of the 11th precinct. 

* * *

Somehow she ended up here. Lauren felt like an idiot, standing awkwardly outside Kieran’s apartment. The snow had begun to fall heavily, large droplets of crystals piling upon window sills and staircases. A few made their way onto her hair, and the cold air practically froze her body to a comfortable temperature. This drug was making her skin blaze, and stripping and jumping in snow began to sound like an amazing idea. It had to be a solid ten minutes of standing outside at the bottom of the steps, her feet pacing along the edge. The sound of the door opened and she heard the familiar chuckle. Her head snapped to him, he was casually lounging against the doorframe in a loose button up shirt and slacks. The suspenders no longer on. 

_The suspenders I grabbed onto so tightly from him plunging his fingers into me. Oh gods, I’ve sunk and drowned in this desire. Save me._

Had she...interrupted something?

“Darling, what the hell are you doing out here in the cold, It’s freezing.” 

Her mouth moved, but words could not escape. “I--”

“Inside, now.” He demanded, leaving the door open and walking back inside. She hurried up the stairs, closing the door and locking it. The comfy warmth of a crackling fire reached her ears and the nice cozy smell of his apartment...warmed up other places. 

_This was a mistake._ No one else seemed to be inside. _Had it been a lie? Or perhaps he had already been with her?_

Kieran was in the kitchen, currently cooking something. The smell of fluffy pancakes and syrup surrounded her in a sweet cloak. 

She couldn’t resist asking. _“_ You’re making breakfast for dinner?”

He stopped what he was doing, his head only turning slightly.

“I have...strange cravings. Feel free to warm up. There’s a blanket on the couch. You know, I waited to see how long it took you to knock on the door, but your stubborn nature got the best of you. If I hadn’t checked the window, you’d have ended up frozen outside my doorstep.” 

“I--you were gone when I returned from patrol.”

Kieran stayed silent, digging through a cabinet. Lauren took that as her cue, placing her shoes on the mat near the door and shrugging off the snow on her jacket, hanging it up on the rack. Her body raced to the couch, grabbing the blanket and cuddling up in it. A sigh of relaxation tickled her lips, her hands rubbing at her frozen toes, the entire time her eyes glued to Kieran’s broad back. 

_Stop looking at him!_

The improper question kept smashing into her brain, her conscious swatting it away. _It’s none of my business. It’s absolutely NONE of my business._

Lauren’s tongue betrayed her. “Kieran, do you have a girlfriend?”

He continued cooking, the question hardly a bother, despite the power it took for her to blurt it out. “Is that what Kym told you?”

She subconsciously twirled a finger around a lock of hair, still staring at his back. “Maybe. I don’t want to interfer--”

The spatula hit the counter with a quiet thud, Kieran’s eyes turning to watch her through his curly messy bangs. 

“I don’t.”

Lauren didn’t say anything, because his eyes finally met hers. His backside pushed against the kitchen drawers, palms resting against the counter. 

“It was just my way of stopping her before anything became a nuisance for you.”

“ _This_ is a nuisance to me.”

“Then we are the same. It is certainly a nuisance for me.”

“So you haven’t…”

“Hmm, darling?”

“Nothing.”

“I haven’t what?”

“Just drop it.”

He didn’t speak, turning his body back to the stove. His white sleeves were pulled up to his elbows, bare arms reaching for the cabinet handle. She let the rattling of plates distract her from more explicit thoughts prickling her mind, the click of a stove jolting her from the fantasy.

“Breakfast is ready!” He flashed a toothy grin. Lauren groaned, the dampness of her pants between her legs becoming uncomfortable. 

_I hate not being in control. I hate this._

She prepared to get up but Kieran stopped her. Balancing two plates upon his palms as he sauntered over to her. “You stay near the fire and enjoy the meal.”

“Well, subordinate, that’s very kind of you to cook for me.” 

He plopped down, placing the plates upon the table. Lauren finally took a gander at the food, rewarded with a surprising display. Her genuine expression showed through. Kieran chuckled.

“This...looks really good.”

He didn’t stop staring at her, humming to himself. 

“Yes...yes it does.”

Two fluffy pancakes were neatly placed on top of one another, blueberries scattered about and syrup delicately pooling over the top. Kieran waited for her to start eating before digging into his. Lauren was utterly content, despite her body buzzing with Kieran so close to her, it was good to have a proper meal. They sat in silence, enjoying the sparks popping from the fire, the howling of the cold brittle wind pressing against the windows. Kieran’s place was comfort. Despite his nature.

After a moment, the air shifted. The energy changed. The sparks sizzled.

The catalyst wasn’t her words. It wasn’t even her admittance that she couldn’t stop thinking about him. It was the smallest droplet of syrup running over his lips and onto his chin. The drug clearly compelled her to do something stupid. So stupid, it would catalyst their entire night forward. Lauren gently placed her empty plate down, the blanket disheveling from her shoulders and falling to the floor. Kieran’s left leg was hitched up onto the couch, the other placed upon the ground. It gave her every advantage. Her body slithered to him, hands flattening against the cushions right near the split in his thighs. Kieran, fork in hand with a blueberry attached to it, brought it to his lips. 

His eyes caught hers as she prowled near him. His teeth bared, trapped the blueberry and crushed it, slivers of juice swimming along his lips. Lauren took a heavy breath, her arms holding her up and her knees crawling forward, hips bumping against his knee. 

She couldn’t read him. He wasn’t acting on her promiscuity. He wouldn’t act. He kept his word. His sapphires glowed with a lust, but his expression remained unphased, sad even. Lauren took the final step, her finger brushing over his chin to grab the sticky syrup, and bringing it to her mouth, plopping her index finger between her lips and sucking. They didn’t break eye contact. Kieran’s chest fell with heavy breaths, clearly affected by her action. She didn’t stop there, leaning forward to catch the rest of the sticky substance, her tongue gently coaxing at his chin and rolling upward, riding along his lips to get the sweet burst of blueberries she so enjoyed. He still didn’t move, fork in hand, the other holding the plate. Golden iris’s watched the tightening of his jaw, the subtle furrow of his brow. 

“What’s wrong, Kieran?” She whispered, her now wet lips biting along his ear. 

His lips came to rest upon the crevice of her neck, whispering just the same. 

“If I make a move, I won’t be able to stop myself this time.” 

Lauren pulled away, wanting to see him. He wasn’t the flirty stupid Kieran. He was being serious. To think she assumed it was all a game to him was the wrong assumption. 

He _cared._

He plunged the fork into another blueberry, all aware of her proximity, setting the plate down afterward. 

“We don’t have to do this. We don’t have to do anything, Lauren.” 

She was so stupid. She came here, out of her own selfish desires because she had no self-control. She asked him to pleasure her in the archives, and even though he was a tease in the infirmary he still offered her all the pleasure, even then. Choosing to go home afterwards and spend the rest of his night not being a burden to her. But deep down inside, a blaze of curiosity and excitement consumed her lungs. She had never been pleased to such an extent before. Maybe it was the drug, maybe it was _something more._ Kieran was delicate, gentle, and loving. All the while passionate and vibrant. A burning star filling the hole in her heart. She desperately wanted more. She wanted to consume and be consumed. More than anything, she knew he had been patient the entire day. To say she was impressed would be an understatement. 

Another victimized blueberry reached his lips, tongue lacing around it and being eaten. 

_Consume me._

“Kiss me, Kieran.” 

His eyes shaded over, buckets of lust swimming along the ocean crystals. Those beautiful and yet haunting eyes of his. He chucked the fork behind him, the pang of the silverware flopping against the wood. He leaned forward so slowly. Finally those sweet lips of his caressed her. His tongue breached her, and she opened her mouth to him. A surprising gift came next, a blueberry falling into her mouth. They smiled against one another, Lauren taking the time to chew the gift he had given. He only gave her a little time, his selfish tongue coating over her teeth and swirling against her tongue; A mutual battle of acceptance. 

Lauren released a moan against his breath, hands gripping his shirt and laying down on top of him. Kieran laid back, letting her straddle him and they continued their make out session. Fingers crept up along the back of her spine, painting shapes all the way up to her neck. His hand roughly gripped her head, pulling her closer. Their heated kiss brought them to the next level. They meshed together like so, seconds, maybe minutes. Exploring each other, hands roaming over their clothing in a frenzy. Lauren shot her hands out, trapping his arms above his head. He let out a devilish laugh, and then a moan, his jaw shooting upward and exposing his neck, her knee slipped right up against his balls. Lauren's lips found a place against his pulse and bit him gently.

“I think it’s my turn to please you.” 

Lauren snaked down his body, hands clinging to his shirt. His eyes followed her, downcasted, sapphires full of sultry and want. She ripped his buttons from the shirt, receiving a surprised look from him. 

“Oops, guess I’ll have to replace those…” 

The smirk remained and he moaned in approval, letting his hands run through her hair, her lips painting his chest, gasping when a tongue rolled along his nipples down the crevice until it reached his V. He couldn’t hide his boner any longer, it begged for release from his slacks. She was aware, taking her time, unbuttoning them at an agonizing pace. Lauren became rough, pulling his pants down all at once, his cock springing free and standing in proud glory. Kieran released the most intoxicating moan she’d ever heard, his eyes shut tightly, his head flung back in the cushions. 

“Lauren…” 

“I haven’t even touched you yet.” She taunted, giving him memories of this morning. She was shocked by his size, but she supposed with his astronomical ego, it had to come packaged with a large dick. He was lengthy but not too much, just the right thickness, it had her clenching her thighs. She licked her lips, but first her small hands found the tip and wrapped around it gently. Kieran gasped loudly, looking down at her in surprise. 

"I don’t think I’ll last, just your touch has me on edge.” He admitted, a blush riding along his cheeks.

“Well, we certainly can’t have that…” She pouted, beginning to stroke him from base to tip. He buckled within her grasp, legs spread as much as possible upon the couch. His hands, reaching for her hair again and tangling within her messy wet locks. She kept her pace slow just as he had done for her, grip tight, her breath close to the tip. He was so warm, Lauren was desperate to know what it felt like inside of her. 

_I can’t even believe I’m thinking this!_

She locked eyes with him again, stroking him faster to illicit another chorus of deep moans from him.

“For fuck s---”

She plunged her tongue upon the tip and Kieran gripped her hair tightly, seething through his teeth. Her tongue worked his cock from above, down below, circling around him like a delicious lollipop. Her hands used the lube to their advantage, stroking at a fast pace. She tried to keep him down, his rustling causing her to bob up and down with him. 

“Stay still, subordinate.” 

“I --” she let her lips fall down upon his tip. Tasting his pre-cum in utter delight. 

“Don’t think I---” He gasped again, her tongue circling over the tip and eating him up. 

“Can…” Kieran was gripping her hair so tightly, but she didn’t complain. He saw spots the moment her lips plunged down upon his cock, and she began sucking him off. 

“Lauren Sinclair, are you the goddess of---AH!” 

She sucked on him hard, a **_POP!_ **resounding through the apartment when she pulled her lips from him to look up at him with those liquid gold gems.

“What was that, _darling?”_ Lauren didn’t let him answer, continuing her pace and plunging down to the base, so far down, her lips kissed his balls and she skillfully deep throated him efficiently. Kieran was thrusting in her mouth, Lauren gathering up speed with her tongue rolling along his member and her lips, squeezing tightly upon him. She was claiming him.

_She was so goddamn good at this._

“Lauren, I--much--mhm l--onger.” 

Kieran sounded like a babbling fool, his hands no longer able to hold onto Lauren, residing instead in his hair as he pulled back his bangs and thrusted upward into her hot wet socket. Head was flung back, his eyes fluttering to the ceiling.

“Not yet.” Her tone of utter dominance rolling through him.

He held out, thrusting upward roughly, his tip meeting the back of her throat each time. He felt the reverberations of her moans on each thrust. He was going to go insane. 

“Lauren...Please.”

She made another **_POP!_ **upon his tip, glaring up at him and running her tongue slowly against the tip soaking in pre-cum. 

“More _please_ , less begging, unless you're only good for begging?” 

Lauren went to work on him again, hands skillfully running with her mouth and stroking him to high heaven. She held his hip down with one hand, the couch squeaking. His body slammed against her mouth in a rough rhythm. 

“Please.”

“Pl--ease, Lauren.” 

“LAUREN, I BEG YOU!!!” Kieran bellowed loudly, he was sure his neighbors would hear. Hell, all of Ardhalis would. 

He felt her triumphing smirk.

“That’s it. Cum for me, Kieran. Give me everything.” She commanded in between popping off his cock and sucking. She went down on him again, deep throating him quick and hard. The heat boiling between his legs reached its peak, and a sensation beyond anything he’d ever known shot through him, sending him into a hallucinatory dream, stars and sprinkles of lights crawling all over his vision. He hadn’t even realized his hands had grabbed her head again, tightly holding her against him as she continued bobbing up and down on his cock. This was it for him, he was going to die here.

“Lauren..I --Lauren!! I’m gonna - cu-” 

He shouted inconsistencies with no conscience, one last thrust as he felt his seed leave him. Lauren continued her heady work, swallowing his load and drinking up every single last drop of him as it hit the back of her throat, coating her cheeks and teeth. She moaned in maddening satisfaction, her lips sucking until she pulled them from his length and letting the cum drop down her lips, onto her chin and finding its home upon her shirt. Her eyes were glazed over as she stared at him. His head was still back against the cushions, his body still shuddering from the insane release he finally had. His hands let her go, his one arm plastering against his forehead to cover his eyes from the blinding light and shooting stars crossing upon his vision. The other arm, dead weight as it hung over the side of the couch. 

Lauren wasn’t surprised by his exhaustion, but she was surprised by her ability of giving him a good blowjob. Something inside of her snapped, and it was as if she could consume him whole. The back of her hand wiped the rest of the mess from her chin, licking her lips to savor his warm and salty taste. She wanted _more._ Kieran was spent, his chest still rising and falling at an incredible rate. Lauren sat there between his legs, eyes hazy and full of lust as she soaked up the image of the man before her. 

“That was amazing.” She admitted, a little naughty smile on her lips. He finally glimpsed at her from beneath his arm, his eyes hooded, lost in her essence. 

Kieran gave a heartfelt sloppy smirk. “You are amazing.”

They sat in silence, his breathing finally crawling to a slow steady pace. Lauren leaned forward to hover above him, his dick still hard and she felt the press of it between her legs. Her lips met his cheek, kissing him gently. 

“How about I get us something to drink. I’m _thirsty.”_

His deep voice cracked, realizing how dry his throat was. 

“Yes, please. Thank you, darling.” 

Lauren stood, feeling the drips of her juices creeping down her thighs. She sighed, knowing Kieran was probably way too exhausted for anything else. Finding herself in the kitchen, she sought out two glasses, tugging open the fridge and pouring them some juice. The fridge slammed before she could put the carton away, jumping at the force. Kieran was behind her, his muscular arm to her right, trapping her against the kitchen counter. Shivers of excitement sparked to her toes, his wet lips finding her ear and sucking. His hot breath shot heat between her legs. Her hand full of jitters, placed the glass to her lips, chugging it all at once. 

“You took too long.” 

She laughed out loud, trying to turn but was stopped by his own cheek pressing against hers. 

Lauren rolled her eyes. Savoring the mix of sweet orange juice and his salty cum on her tongue. “I was literally away for five seconds.”

“Five seconds too long.” 

His hands snaked along her hip bones, caressing her pale skin and making a slow trip up beneath her shirt. She sucked in a breath, feeling his cold digits over her taut stomach. Her head spun and she fell back against him. With one of her hands, she found her power, reaching behind to feel his cock pressing hard against her ass, which still was sadly covered with her pants. His hand on her stomach stopped at the sudden strokes controlling him once again. 

He cursed, “Damn it” thrusting into her grasp and leaning forward onto her. His head plopped to her shoulder, teeth biting his lower lip. 

Lauren scoffed, her breath tickling some of his hair. “Who says I was even done with you?” He laughed into her ear, biting down onto it. 

“Oh? Well then, Officer. Why don’t you show me what else you have in store for me.” 

Lauren quickly turned around and pushed him against the table. Her hand reached out, wrapping upon his throat lightly. His expression melted into pure shock and subtle horror.

“Lau---”

“Shh…” She tightened her grip only a little, and saw the pain in his eyes. The regret. The sadness. A tightness pulled in his chest, hearing the echoes of her voice calling out to him. 

_It was stupid of me to believe you could be human --even for a second!_

_You’re nothing but a monster._

It was all she needed to see, to know there was a soul buried deep inside of him that _felt something._ She let go, her fingers trailing down along his chest. His heart was thumping loudly against her palm and the left over sweat of his pleasure was cooling to a dampening chill. Finally, she gained the courage to look up at those deep blue eyes, swimming in regret and fear. 

His brows furrowed. An enormous expression of pain rising over him. His eyes flooded, glistening. Beautiful azure crystals of life and humanity reaching out to her and piercing her heart. Three whispered words fell through his lips, 

“I’m so sorry.”

Her finger caught a droplet that slid over his cheek, placing it to her lips and licking it, _consuming it._

  
“Show me, Kieran White. Prove to me how _human_ you really are.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Sips on her drink* 
> 
> Oh, hey guys. I did it. I gave Kieran a break. (A very small break). That doesn't mean he shouldn't be degraded to get what he wants. Mwahaha!!! More to come...oh so much more to come. 
> 
> *Cackles loudly* 
> 
> It took me much longer to write this one...it was EXHAUSTING. But well worth it. And the ending was improv I am so not sorry for that. 
> 
> Feel free to throw suggestions, this ride has only just begun. 
> 
> Kudos/Comments help my mug stay spicy and hot!


	4. Station Of Humanity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lauren's fingers wrapped along his throat was shell shock for Kieran. He races out of the apartment, and the two of them dwell on what they should do and what they have done. What's in store for these two stubborn fools that doesn't end in angst?
> 
> I think we all know the answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to let you know! There is a lot of BUILD UP to this chapter. I want to be very clear, Lauki's relationship is the most important part of this story, this isn't mindless smut with no plot. There is *releases party poppers* CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT! Yay! 
> 
> So, that being said, it will be a bit of time in this story before the SPICE happens. If you're here just for the smut, better start scrolling, Okay, but honestly wtf are you doing, read this beautiful flangst (for angst & fluff together respectively) because then the SPICE is so much more enticing and WORTH IT!

**Chapter IV: Station of Humanity**

Lauren watched him walk out the door. He didn’t even bother with a jacket. She couldn’t tell if he was more terrified by the implication of her fingers around his throat, her seeing him cry, or asking him to prove to her how human he could be. She was beginning to realize, after standing in the kitchen for a good ten minutes, that it could very well be every single one of those things that made him go haywire and flee the apartment. He apologized before he left, pulling on his clothes and telling her he needed fresh air. He threw her the extra pair of keys and told her to lock the door on the way out once she was ready to leave.

Twenty minutes had passed, and then she became worried. Choosing instead to clean the dishes and fix the couch to keep her mind busy. Was it a mistake to do that? Was it too soon to feel like she had some kind of power over him? Was it the wrong approach in doing so? It was a shock to her that it only took something as harrowing as reflecting the action back to understand his feelings on the matter. He didn’t even speak other than the heart wrenching apology he choked out. He had apologized once before in the storage closet at Carmine Camelia’s, but _this_ was a raw emotion. So much that it made him cry. How could she be foolish enough to think that he was ready to show her he could be human? He wore the mask of Kieran White on purpose. She knew. It was his way of coping so it wouldn’t slip and reveal the monster he thought he was. She, herself just as much of a fool. Telling him it won’t ever happen again, only to eat those words and _have him eat me out and me swallow him whole right here on this couch._ Lauren chucked the pillow into its place, glaring into the cushions. 

Lauren groaned, heading to the bedroom to look around. She picked up some of his clothes that hung upon the chair and folded them, tucking them into his drawer. She paced the bedroom, scanning over his books once more like the first time she was here. Her mind couldn’t focus on the bindings or words in front of her. Her lips still had a tingle to them, the sweetness of the pancakes, and the passionate kisses he gifted her. Was he always so passionate? Did he write and draw precision on every single one of his moves with every woman or man he was intimate with? Was this just how Kieran was, or was it for her specifically? She wanted to know his feelings, despite how messy this drug situation had gotten. Quite, literally. Could they both really go back to the way things were after all this was over? Lauren sighed again, falling to the bed and rustling her hair in frustration. 

_Even worse, I want him to come back and continue where we left off. I don’t want this night to be over. His touch was...electrifying and soothing._

Like a cool ocean wave trailing along her toes, sun high in the sky, a gentle breeze upon the wind. The warmth of the blanket upon the couch, the crackling of a fire, and the smell of pine in the air on a cold winter day. Comfort. Kieran was comfort. He was warm, a protective embrace and she had finally realized his presence filled the emptiness inside of her. That void of unhappiness eating away at her soul. That taunting and irritable void that dragged her through her days and fueled her justice, _her vengeance._ Even though her whole purpose of making the deal with Kieran was that very thing, somehow he was helping her slowly let go of that need for _revenge._ She still knew next to nothing about him, his reasoning for wanting to take down the Leader. Why he would risk making the deal with her. Promising not to let any harm come to her friends. Even as to go so far as to say that he would disobey orders if it meant protecting her, and yet without knowing him at all, he still wrapped her in this cloak of passion and freedom.

Had he also found that comfort to close his void? 

Was it her?

Somewhere along the way for their desire to get vengeance, had they instead found something within each other that could help them move on? Lauren shook her head, staring at her feet plastered to the wooden floor. _No._ Just because they were intimate today with one another purely from a drug, does not mean suddenly they have feelings for each other. Things like that just don’t happen. She still couldn’t forgive him for what he did _yet,_ and he obviously still could not forgive himself for hurting her. If he had, he wouldn’t have stormed out. He would have continued with their lustful touches and delicate kisses. Kieran was constantly holding back, and she was beginning to realize how selfless he was. Her lashes fluttered, legs pulling up onto the mattress and curling up on the bed. She’d wait for him here. She was sure he was expecting her to be gone, but she’d wait. She owed him that. 

* * *

Echoes of footfall wrapped around the comfortable silence of the cold winter night. Delicate tiny snowflakes cascading down, floating along the chilly breeze and finding a home upon the surfaces of Ardhalis. Kieran, hands in his pockets, fiddled with the buttons from this morning. He gritted his teeth, not from the frozen air, but the disgust attempting to ride its way up within his throat. 

_I deserve nothing that she has to offer. I should have stopped her this morning. Even if she enjoyed herself today, she can do better. I’ll only taint her._

Kieran kicked some snow building up along the sidewalk. He shivered, his newly worn thin button up shirt and slacks not bracing well for the flurry of snow picking up by the second. He lost track of how long he had been walking, or where he was walking. He must have been getting close to Grey Chapel. The rundown buildings towered ahead, the eerie silence wrapped around his frigid form, and dark alleyways came into view. He stopped in his tracks, head falling to a limp, eyes void of any concentration.

_She probably left by now._

As she should. This night was over, and they needed to put it behind them. They couldn’t bother with these kinds of complications and he definitely didn’t want her wrapped up with someone like him in any way besides professional. 

_Too late idiot, I’ve done absolutely everything to her that was deemed unprofessional._

_Almost everything._

Kieran shouted into the silence, palms on his temples, eyes strained shut. 

_Stop thinking about the things you don’t deserve!_

Kieran slid on his heels, the slosh of wet snow filling beneath his shoes. He headed back quicker, the shivers tugging on his nerves and his hair soaked from the blizzard picking up. Eventually, he reached his doorstep. Pulling out his keys, his hands shaking from the cold, numb to the frost. His breath clouded around him, focusing on unlocking the door. He breathed a sigh of relief when he stepped in, closing the door and locking it. 

_It smells like her._

He stopped, turning to the fire wood still burning.

_She-_

He slipped his shoes off, ready to place them down and stopped again. Her shoes still sat neatly at the entrance, coat on the rack. 

_She didn’t leave._

Kieran inhaled the comfort of his home, running a hand through his wet bangs. He crept through the apartment, pushing open his bedroom door quietly to see Lauren peacefully sleeping on the bed. He held his breath for a moment, taking in her slumped form. Tangles of red fire, a veil upon her pale cheeks and sprawling along her frilly white shirt. He observed the slow rise of her breathing, a subtle sweet rhythm. He turned away, realizing that it might be weird to be staring. His hand reached for the doorknob, preparing to close it when he heard a stir. Lauren groaned in her sleep, brows furrowing and a painful expression flashing over her. She adjusted, rolling to her right and away from his gaze. She released another painful groan, lips trembling after each breath. 

_Was she having a nightmare?_

Lauren tossed and turned, legs twisting among the blanket, hair disheveling across his pillow. He was reminded of all the times he’d wake up in cold sweat from the never ending nightmares. Should he wake her? Hope she rides it out? Kieran, still frozen in the doorway, watched as she started to struggle. Sweat beading along her temple, teeth grinding. He flew forward, falling to his knees next to the bed and shaking her shoulder. There was only so much he could bear, and seeing Lauren suffering wasn’t one of them.

“Lauren. Lauren. Wake up.” His hand went to her face. It was clammy, her head shifting to the left and laying against his touch. Her body relaxed, his chilly palm flattening against her cheek. “Wake up, Lauren.” He spoke a little louder this time. With a groan, those golden gems fluttered open slowly. 

“Kie--Kieran.” She mumbled, voice dry but a hint of surprise was there. 

“You were having a nightmare. Sorry, I had to wake you.” He sat down on the edge of the bed, ready to pull his hand away but her sweaty palms reached out, tugging his hand back to her cheek. 

“It’s okay. It happens so often.” She was still half in slumber, practically cradling his arm. "You're so cold."

“I--I thought you’d have left.” He admitted, letting his fingers play with the auburn strands sticking to her skin. Lauren finally opened her eyes to look at him, pushing up to sit, his hand falling to her lap where she held it. 

“It didn’t feel right to just leave after what I did. I’m sorry.”

He laughed gently. “Why are you sorry? This is all my fault.” He wasn’t just talking about the time in the cave. So _many_ things were his fault. Lauren leaned forward, gazing directly into the uncertainty he was trying to hide. 

A small whisper embraced him. The words he feared, but they were not the ones he expected. 

“I have no regrets from today.” 

He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t feel. A numbing prickle crawling up his legs to his arms, along his fingers which she held, to his lips that still had the tingle of lust upon them. He gulped. His confession on the brink of release.

“I would never regret a moment with you.” 

That warming soft smile, reminiscent of the time on the bridge shadowed over her. 

_“Show me, Kieran White. Prove to me how human you really are.”_

A thought came to him, he stood up, her hand in his. He didn’t speak, pulling her along until she was standing, fingers laced as he led her out of the bedroom. Lauren's curiosity perked. They stopped short in front of the locked door. Kieran fumbled with his pockets again, his free hand reaching for a golden key. She was gazing up at him with doe eyes, and giving a slight squeeze to his hand. 

“I’d like to show you the most---human side of me.” He stumbled with his words, the mere thought of it escaping him and being said out loud felt preposterous. 

_Him, human?_

Lauren nodded with apprehension, watching him turn the key and cracking open the door. His hand left hers, flattening to her back. He let her go first, golden iris’s of interest roaming upon the contents that lay inside. His heart thumped loudly in his chest, sweat beginning to drip down his back. His eyes couldn’t leave Lauren, the way her hair swayed along her back as her head turned at every corner of the room. She didn’t speak. She consumed the entire room, observing, analyzing, maybe rationalizing that perhaps he wasn’t even sane. Lauren’s fingertips fell along the stacks of boxes to the left of the open door. Many were haphazardly placed on top one another, sketches laid underneath them, or stacked on the sides. She brushed the dust along the boxes he hadn’t touched, drawings and memories he could no longer look at. The _dark_ memories his hand frivolously scattered upon those old pages. 

No, only his most joyful pieces of work were laid out upon the walls for her eyes to see. And yet, she wasn’t even looking at them. She still paid attention to all the little details of the room. The towering boxes, the messy organization. The piling of his soul into one room. Tucked away, hidden, and forgotten like much of his past. Lauren’s gaze fell to the right, absorbing the rest of the room in curiosity, and was that perhaps, delight he saw? A little smile tucked upward upon those lips he had kissed not even an hour ago. Kieran kept still at the doorway, not wanting to rouse her from her trance, like a crow perched upon the tree, observing from above. Lauren, a glowing ray of light in the middle of a graveyard, a graveyard of his past, his troubles, his failures, his memories long forgotten, the people he couldn’t save, and the lives he took. This room held everything about him in some way or another. It was his heart and soul, his work of passion and pain, laid out before her. 

“This is...all of your work?” She stood in the middle of the room, taking in his secrets.

“It helps.” He knew he didn’t have to explain to her. She knew the troubles he had. 

Lauren hummed at his response, walking up to his desk to inspect some of the work laid upon its worn surface. She flipped on the small lamp, utterly intrigued by his work space. He swallows the heavy emotions reaching his throat and takes the step forward. His strides are slow and cautious.

“Who are these children?” Her fingers brushed along the paper, careful not to touch the drawn lines and shaded marks. 

“Orphans. From Grey Chapel. They’re good children.” Lauren looked up at him in shock, the ignorance showing and the pity creeping upon her expression. 

“I never--”

“It’s alright. They’re strong. It’s why I drew them. They face so many hardships, and still they stick together and live each day the best they can.” Kieran couldn’t hide the smile that perked along the edges of his lips. He understood them too well, but he never wanted to tell Lauren that. She watched him in awe, glancing back down to the desk and sliding the drawing away to see a canvas of her friends. 

“You drew--Kym and Will. This is really beautiful.” 

He watches her admire her friends on the page. Kieran lets out a hum of his own, leaning against the desk and crossing his arms. 

"They seem really happy together. I couldn’t help but draw them. It's a shame they don’t see that.”

Lauren lets out a gentle laugh. It makes him shiver, her happiness is intoxicating and her presence this close to him has him burning up inside. The drug by now has such a strong effect on him he can’t seem to contain the fire burning up in his stomach. It’s at its peak and yet the two of them are here, together _not embracing and fucking until sunrise_. Kieran bit his tongue. It wasn’t a good idea. He should leave this room. She should go home but the weather would more than likely keep her with him tonight. He wants to ignore it, because she owes him nothing, and she’s already done too much. Kieran bites his lip this time as distraction, conjuring up the thoughts, the emotions he wants to express about her friends; what they make him feel. He watches her, straining his eyes from the soft glimmer on her lips that shine from the lamp she switched on.

“Seeing those two, happy and bantering. It’s a simple feeling but so revolutionary in the scheme of life. The small things to be thankful for. They’re people you aspire to be. Their lives, full of joy, even though their hardships are probably buried deep and difficult to deal with. They still can go on, and find something worthwhile down the road.” Lauren was staring at him with a gloom expression, a hint of sorrow curling along her lips. That frown back, but he didn’t want her pity. He just wanted to express himself and he was starting to realize he never knew how to with words. For all of his emotions could only be laid out on paper, and never anything but. _It terrified him._

“Your perspective...is so hauntingly warm but there’s such a fleeting sadness in you, Kieran.” Lauren reached her hand to his cheek, caressing his cold skin. He couldn’t control his emotions if he wasn’t using a pencil, and therefore, her caress had him leaning into her palm. She was so vibrant. The only light that kept him from slipping, and yet she had only just entered his life. He couldn’t imagine it without her anymore, and it sent him into a spiral of anxiety and terror. He didn’t want to be attached when he knew at any moment he could lose her. 

_I did almost lose her._

Her hand slid from his before he could reciprocate her touch. She smiled at him and let her gaze fall to the brick walls. She soaked every drawing in with an immense interest. His eyes focused behind her, the drawing of her on the bridge facing him. With a jolt, Kieran slipped around her, leaning against the wall and standing in front of it casually.

_I can’t let her see that._

She noticed his swift movement, turning to him with an arched eyebrow. 

“Kieran, what are you hiding?” 

**“Nothing.”**

“Let me see.”

“ **It’s nothing.”**

“Come on, move.”

Her searing touch on his shoulder had him flinching. He was sweating with the lust trying to consume him and the nervousness of what she would say to him drawing her. 

“I-”

Lauren crossed her arms, tapping her foot. Kieran sighed with reluctance and moved aside. The surprise on her face bloomed, and then that same soft smile reflected back onto her. 

“Kieran...this was.”

“It was the first time I saw a genuine smile from you, I wasn’t going to draw you at first, but it wouldn’t leave my mind. I’m sorry if that’s not--”

“I love it. I-no one has ever drawn me before.” She blushed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, the subtle bite of her lip not going unnoticed by his eyes. 

Her hooded eyes looked up at him, bashfulness shining through. 

“What--what made you draw me?” 

Kieran took another look at this piece of work. His favorite to be exact. His freezing hands went to his pockets. He analyzed it like he would if he was in a musuem. Taking in all the perfect details of Lauren at her best. He remembers each pencil stroke that flourished from this particular work. She moved closer as well, turning her head in thought and basking in his silence. He felt her impatience.

Did _she want to know his thoughts? His feelings?_

"This piece helps me hold on to what I could be. Who I used to be. And the motivation that someday, I could be better. You--all of you are so _human_ but I-I'm--" He stuttered, trapping his tongue and clenching his jaw. Lauren’s hand reached to land on his bicep, gripping it gently. 

“I think you’re doing a wonderful job at showing me how _human_ you really can be.” Her reassurance brought him back, and this time he let his hand find hers, gripping it tightly. 

“I have one more drawing to show you, it’s important.” 

She nodded in apprehension, letting him guide her back to the desk. Their hands still intertwined, his other digits busy at moving some of the papers and folders. He grabbed for the most recent work he did. Lauren inhales a small gasp, and her body stills. Fingers reach out, gripping the edge of the paper gently and running her thumb over the words written upon it. 

_Why did I freeze?_

Her heart leapt, her own question echoing in her mind. _He as well?_ She took in the artwork. His form rigid, sword at her throat and eyes wide. She could still remember his sapphires staring down at her in shock as he almost killed her there in the alleyway. The piercing of the sword on her throat, leaving a little cut. He drew her just as she had felt that night. Terrified, uncertain, curious. Her saucers, globes of gold swimming with the acceptance that she was done for. But he didn’t kill her. He didn’t slit her throat. He didn’t leave her body there to rot in the alleyway for her friends to find.

_Why did he freeze?_ She begged the question without turning to him, hand squeezing his instead. 

“Kieran, why didn't you kill me that day?" 

Time stilled, the air froze. Their hands however, now clammy and pulsating with each other. She could feel his heartbeat in her palm. His terror. The nervousness, the anxiety rising along his shoulders. Kieran exhaled, releasing the energy. With a shift, he’s facing her and inhaling again. His chest rises with tension. His tongue rides along his lips, distracting her from the confession she’d been waiting to hear. Everyday she wondered, everyday she asked the question in her mind. His eyes, that of confliction and a gentle stroke from his thumb along her palm fed her with the consideration he was putting into his answer. Kieran was like his hyacinths, fluttering along the wind, so fragile, but a beautiful color masked with the drench of blood. She could never count the amount of emotions fleeing from him because he seemed to constantly be experiencing so many at once, when his walls weren’t up that is. His glistened lips parted. Her eyes stayed on them for a moment, meeting his gaze when his words filled the air.

"I didn't see your pensive eyes that day. I saw a vibrance. A radiance that I once knew. It drew me in, threw me back into time. Held me together. It was the first time in so long my heart actually felt like it was beating. I felt--alive. I thought maybe I could find myself, or keep that feeling for just a little longer if I stuck around you.” He stopped suddenly, letting go of her hand and stepping away. 

“I'm sorry, that's selfish of me."

Lauren grasped for both of his hands, pulling them to her lips and gently kissing his knuckles. He straightened, almost tugging away from the lips that would send him to the heavens he didn’t belong in. Her whispers brushed over his frigid skin, blooming a beam of joy and reassurance into his soul. 

"Kieran. You're not alone anymore. It's okay to have that need. The want. The desire to _feel_ human again. It's whether or not you'll let yourself become anything else other than the monster you think you are."

He didn’t stop the sudden burst of tears flowing from his eyes. He didn’t want to miss her beautiful serene face looking up at him in all her innocence. _What innocence he hadn’t taken._ Her perky nose, those rosy lips, the summer iris’s. She was a flower constantly blooming and birthing his world into light. Now she had witnessed him cry twice in one night. 

_I guess this too would become a trend._

Lauren pulled him to her, his arms instinctively wrapping around her shoulders so her head could bury into his chest. They embraced and the two of them released exhausted sighs together. Lauren held onto him tightly, caressing his back and helping push the chokes riding over him. Tears blanketed her shoulder. It felt so good to _let go._ They stood like this for a moment, Lauren patient with him as he calmed his shakes and brushed away his tears. Pulling back from her warmth, his fingers played with the strands of hair covering her eyes. 

“Would you like to see more of my drawings, darling?”

She beamed, a sly smirk perching on her lips.

“That’s the right way to entertain a guest.” 

He kept his lips shut, the temptation to say something _naughty_ held firm on his tongue. Kieran reluctantly let go of her, beginning to dig through his belongings he hadn’t dared open in a very long time. He’d start with his old collection, when he first learned to draw. He’d show her his different techniques, and the most precious of his works, his paintings. _When he used colors._ Someday, he would use them again, and Lauren would be the first thing he paints. Lauren, like a little child excited for ice cream, helped him pull out old papers carefully. She flipped through them with joy, every once in a while asking him about them. He’d laugh, pulling other boxes down and going through them to make sure he wanted to release those demons. Eventually, the drawing room was filled with paper and artwork. Lauren sprawled out on the floor and excitement radiating from her. Kieran took a break from digging, making her hot chocolate and grabbing them a snack. He also made sure to grab a blanket and a few pillows, laying them out on the floor for her to get comfy. 

They stayed there for a couple hours, disheveling the drawing room and organizing his work. Lauren was delicate with the sketches, placing them neatly in piles. She went on about framing his work, getting him shelves and giving advice on doing commission. Her passion drove him mad, in the most exciting way. To see someone so happy about his hobby, _his passion_ made him want to drop the PS for good and become an artist. He was busy rearranging the boxes in a neat stack when he heard the surprise gasp from behind him. 

“What’s wrong?” His eyes shot to her hands, holding pieces of his artwork. Not just any old artwork, however.

“Kieran--you…” She blushed, placing them in a stack and turning away from him. He laughed at her shyness, meeting her upon the floor and grabbing for the nostalgic sketches. 

“These helped me learn anatomy. It’s nothing to be shy about.” His smirk formed when he laid out the sketches for her to look at. Many of them, half drawn naked forms, or full body sketches. 

“Did-did you know some of these people?” Lauren’s face was still flushed, Kieran grabbing for a grape that was on their snack plate, staring at the papers and chewing thoughtlessly. He hummed, scooting closer to her to have a closer look at his old drawings. 

“I knew some of them." 

He pointed to a drawing closer to her thigh, tapping it. "I --dated this woman, for a short while. She was a little crazy though.” 

He was pointing to a skinny girl, long straight hair that fell along her nipples, supple thighs squished together upon a sofa chair, wine glass in hand. He froze, noticing the striking similarities Lauren had with a few of these women he dated, and the many he slept with over time. 

_Oh f--, will she notice?_

Lauren turned the images sideways and every which way, analyzing them in thought. 

“You put a lot of passion into _these_ sketches.”

“Many of them are...were passionate people.” 

He didn’t speak any more on the matter, grabbing another grape to pop into his mouth. Lauren reached for another sketch, amusement flashing across her face. A flexible man laid bare minus the robe delicately hanging from his form, whiskey glass barely in hand. He was lounging in a tub with no water, one leg hanging over the edge, the other stretching up past his shoulder and propped up on the window sill. The robe hardly covered him and a silly smirk like Kieran’s beamed through the page. Long hair cascaded over his muscles and even his nails were colored in. Lauren tried not to laugh, but a snort escaped her.

“And who is this exquisite young man?”

Kieran laughed, grabbing the sketch and flipping it over to reveal a photograph of him and the same man, arms around each other’s shoulders, drinks in hand. 

"That’s Zephyr. We were good _friends_ at one time. The past was...interesting.” 

Lauren chuckled, examining the photo of a younger Kieran. Nineteen or twenty, perhaps. “Hmm, so you had lovers of all kinds. That’s not a surprise.” 

“I attract _very interesting_ individuals, darling”

He was staring at her, letting the next grape he grabbed slowly slip between his lips. She peaked at him through her long locks, a little peculiar smile forming.

A low sultry voice came from her. “Hmm, yes something I can relate to.” Her fingers reached out to grab the grape before he could eat it, his lips kissing her skin. He watched her pop it into her mouth, a little smirk she playfully presented while she chewed.

“You’re eating them all.” She admitted, his stare completely focused on her lips. Kieran scoffed at her accusation, responding with a wit. 

_“I’m hungry,_ darling.” 

Lauren leaned forward on all fours, crawling between his legs. Just like on the couch, her predatory gaze focused on the way his sapphire’s watched her movements. She exhaled near his ear, hands planted on either side of his hips. Her seductive whisper jolted his dick awake. 

“There’s _plenty_ to eat.” 

Kieran tilted his head to lay against hers. The soft locks of fire still smelled of fresh snow. He growled in her ear the moment her teeth bit along his lobe. 

“I knew you wouldn’t make the first move. So, you’re going to make me?” She whispered a little louder this time, legs scooting forward more and practically sitting in his lap. 

“Lauren, I was never…”

She shut him up, hand reaching for the bulge between his legs. He shifted, a gasp falling loose on his lips and blowing locks of her hair into a frazzle. 

“You think you’re not good enough? Is that what you’re going to say? Still going to give me a speech on why you’re not worth my time? Maybe continue in your self-loathing and pitiful hatred?” 

Kieran gulped, almost terrified of her quick flip in attitude. _Was she taunting me?_

“That’s--not very nice to say.” He joked, pulling away to directly look at her. She rolled her eyes, and a little excitement blew through him, waking the lustful monster inside once more. 

_To have her so lost in the blissfulness of the pleasure he could give her that she rolls her eyes back like that for me._

_To hear the sweet tantalizing moans leave her breath as she says my name--._

“Kieran.” 

He blinked, Lauren still almost sitting in his lap, but she had pulled back looking at him with a furrowed brow. He cleared his throat, “Yes, darling?”

“I already told you I have no regrets. I--maybe it’s just the drug, the lust. Even if it is, or even if it’s--” she stopped, turning her head with a blush. “Maybe it’s something _else._ But I want to keep this feeling I’ve had all day, _with you._ ” 

“It’s just the drug. You’ll feel normal tomorrow and those regrets will come back. I don’t want that for you. We haven’t crossed that line, but it’s already been detrimental to our partnership. Our partnership and our missions are a lot more important than some... _fling._ You and I both know this isn’t a good idea.”

It took all of his willpower to speak the words. To bring forward the truth, the painful, physical and mental painful truth that some emotions were better off not expressing. If it was anyone who could suppress emotions and control them, it was him. Lauren tried to hide her hurt expression, backing away from him and beginning to pick up the art still scattered on the floor. 

_What the hell was that?_

She looked frustrated, biting her lip and a glare burning into the wood floor. 

_I’m sure she isn’t having a very good time dealing with the aphrodisiac, as well as I am, but I shouldn’t--_

He watched her stack the drawings, placing them in a box and closing the lid, standing to lift it and neatly drop it on top of the others sitting against the wall. Kieran watched her in silence, cleaning up the drawing room until only the papers upon the desk remained. She walked to it, standing there and looking down at the sketch from earlier. 

_The moment I almost took her glimmer of sun rays and beauty away from this world. What a fool I would have been._

When she didn’t speak, he stood, the pain in his groin and thighs causing him to flinch. He saw her shoulders shake, and a sniffle escaping her breath. 

_Oh no, I made her cry. I’m such a piece of shit!_

“Lauren, what’s wrong?” Kieran made quiet strides toward her. His hand reached out, holding her shoulder gently to try and calm her down. She turned with his gentle push, covering her face so that more tears wouldn’t escape. 

“Talk to me” he begged, this time letting both his hands support her tiny shoulders. 

She took a moment, calming down and brushing the tears from her face. “It’s nothing, I’m just feeling really emotional. It must be the drug. I--feel so many things right now.” She couldn’t look at him, she wouldn’t look at him.

“It’s normal. You’ll go through these phases, but it’ll calm down by the morning. You’ll feel fine then. Maybe you should go rest.” Finally, those blazing orbs of molten lava flooded him, the small lamp illuminating her soul and consuming him. 

“There are still two things you have yet to do that I have asked of you.” Her voice low, a commanding tremble but also a plea. 

“What?” He almost stuttered, that same predatory glare snaring him, wrapping him up in vines and squeezing him until he couldn’t breathe. 

“You haven’t fixed _our_ problem and you have yet to prove to me how _human_ you really are.” 

Kieran’s head tilted back in surprise, eyes widening at her suggestions. _She wants you, fool. Make a move!_

“Is this room not enough proof?” 

She didn’t blink, her hand coming to flatten against his chest. The wind was knocked out of him, Lauren’s palm pushing him into his desk roughly. The lamp flew from its spot on the surface, tumbling to the ground with a shatter and casting them into the moonlight pooling from the window. 

_At least it wasn’t a kick._

She sauntered forward, trapping him between her heated body and his work station. A thigh pressed hard against his cock, which was incredibly noticeable by now, he hadn’t bothered to even hide it at this point. 

“How much of a man are you, really? Under all that ego, charm, and stupid remarks. What is left of you?” 

_Note to self, aphrodisiacs and Lauren combined are terrifying. Never again._

Kieran gave his best smile, hands finally reaching out to touch her. His fingers slipped along her slim waist. “Your bravery is astounding me right now. I’m not sure whether to be scared or completely turned on.” 

Lauren leaned into him, pressing her body fully against him, her breasts squishy and warm through her silly thin shirt and his cock riding along the inside of her thigh. Their breaths danced together; glimmering orbs of fire and ice reflecting through one another. They were at a pause. Gazing, analyzing, debating, waiting. Despite his struggle with his lustful approach, he could stay this way forever. Watching her, feeling her against him, and nothing more. However, this was about her. What she wanted. 

_What I want._

Fingers raised, brushing along her jaw. The fingers that held her against the cave wall. That almost stole the light from her soul. The hands that slid the glint to her throat. Those same very hands that swung the blade on countless lives. He shook nervously. Lauren gripped his wrists, squeezing them and her cheek leaned into his touch, lips pressing to his skin and kissing each finger. She drove away the guilt, brushed away the blood and his crimes, _just for tonight._ Their eyes met and she stopped, giving him the brightest smile. “I love your hands, Kieran.” She whispered softly, as if talking to them and not him. 

They slid from her embrace to snake along her spine and up to her neck, pulling her closer. She let her head fall forward and they met in the middle, Kieran leaning upward to capture her passion, her lust, her desires, her wants, her needs. Lauren’s hands, busy now with his shirt, delicately unbuttoning them this time. He led her forward, moving his lips against hers in sweet caressing motions. Nothing intense, just nibbles and gentle kisses riding her along the turbulent wave of rushing heat and scorching fire. His chest burned, fueled with the flames of something _more_ than he expected. It was so horribly terrifying. Lauren was in her element, the fire goddess snuffed out his winter chill, heat radiating from her temptations and coursing the fuel that was his desire. They separated for only a moment, taking in a breath of air, and sealing the gap once more. This time, more passionate, more pushes, more groans. She hadn’t opened up to him yet, and he was okay with this. Her hands were busy, reaching the last button on his shirt and tugging it off his shoulders swiftly. He let it fall upon the desk, his hands still gentle with her, gripping her just enough to keep her close to him. He was addicted to her reciprocation, drunk on her attention. 

Nails scratched over his chest, fingertips brushing along the faded scars of the past, a few more recent, from their shadowy adventures beneath the moon. Desperate hands reached for his pants, flicking the button loose. He smirked against her lips, biting her lower lip with entice. He didn’t want to break the comfortable passionate silence, instead using his actions as proof of what he could give her. What he could show her. Kieran’s arms tightened around her waist, and she let out a yelp, flipping her over quickly and her ass plopping onto his desk. His station of humanity. She fit perfectly, the desk his canvas and her, the epitome of his reasoning as of late for _why_ he sketched. Kieran didn’t let her speak, spreading her thighs with his fingers, leaning forward and kissing her senselessly. She had fooled him one too many times since the beginning of the day. Every time he thought she’d tell him to stop, she proved him wrong. With the thought, he smirked, testing his limits. He mumbled upon her soaked lips. 

“I thought you said this will never happen again, officer?” 

He let his hands do the rest of the talking, fingers delicately pulling her shirt over her head and Kieran finally getting a full view of the matching maroon bra to the fallen ripped panties. 

Lauren’s husky voice blew upon his cheek. “I’ll deal with that statement later, right now I just want to _feel_ you.” 

With a lazy smile, he brushed his fingers around her ribs, finding the hooks on her bra and unclasping them. 

“I wonder really, if it is a coincidence that you chose to wear this particular color today.” 

“Perhaps.” She smiled, letting the bra fall to the ground, her reddened cheeks burning at the sight of him taking her in. Kieran lost his ability to speak, hands moving faster than his thoughts. He cupped her breasts with both his calloused palms and she gasped, tightening her thighs against him. His thumbs flicked upon her tiny pink hardened nipples, eliciting a pleasurable whimper from her. 

“You’re perfect.” He could only manage a whisper, too busy feeling her soft skin kiss his own, his mind sketching up the perfect work without even using his eyes. He admits, her time in that red dress had him imagining all kinds of shapes and sizes that her breast could be. 

_Shame on me._

It was hard not to look when she came dressed _like that._ She purposely exposed herself to him, be it for the mission or not, he garnered a look several times that night because she was too beautiful not to. Just a peek, her milky skin glowing beneath the low warm lighting. Just like now, in his hands, perked up from his touch. But this view was better. She was utterly ethereal beneath the moon. Lauren was gasping with every brush, every stroke.

_I want to taste all of her._

Kieran leaned down, fully taking her right nipple into his mouth, sucking and flicking his tongue along the beautiful bud. Lauren’s hands fell to his locks of darkened blue, tugging gently and pulling. She massaged his head, scratching him every time he flicked her nipple, swirling his tongue in a hypnotizing circular motion. His arms had wrapped around her almost in a tight hold, as if she would turn to dust in his embrace. Lauren’s hands gripped the back of his neck, pulling him closer to her, and he switched, giving the other breast attention. Her legs by now had reached higher and squeezed him closer. He lapped his tongue over her sensitive bud, hands reaching back around to massage her breasts gently in maddening pleasurable symmetry. 

Lauren didn’t let him assault her with his tongue for long, tugging on his hair and pulling him up to kiss him with fierce riding on her new found pleasure. Her tongue slid along his teeth and he obliged, opening to play with her. The gears switched, the room heated, the passion turned the tide and they became aggressive. Lauren might as well have sucked his soul from his lips. They turned their heads every few seconds, grasping at new places to taste and explore. She bit his lips each chance she got, hardly letting him catch a breath. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders and Kieran went tumbling forward on top of her. It was a shock to him that the desk even held both their weight.

His hands reached her _favorite_ pants, quickly unzipping them, tugging them down off her thighs and discarding them to a corner of the room. Her own hands came down to the button she had flicked off early, finishing them off and tugging his pants down with her feet. He stepped out of them quickly, pushing against her roughly. Lauren groaned with satisfying acceptance, their kisses sloppy and slick, deep and desperate. She laid bare before him, and the only thing stopping him was the last piece of clothing he had and his willpower. She watched as he pulled away from her kisses, swollen lips pursuing and tongue lathering them. Lauren saw the thoughts in his expression, the halt in his eyes. 

She took that as her initiative, her fingers tracing the band on his underwear and tugging roughly, just like before on the couch. She rid him of his clothes until they both were exposed to their desperation. She unfaltering, him uncertain. Her heart fluttered, the craze erratic beats of her heart causing her to take in a shape inhale. Why did she have to be so nervous? This was nothing new, and yet, seeing Kieran, and those sunken deep blue eyes staring down at her made her feel _something incredible._ His stare worshiped her, embraced her, admired her, dare she think, _loved_ her. 

“There’s still time. We can turn back. You can still make the call.” He whispered, forehead drifting to hers. Their sweat accumulated, sliding along their temples and the crevices of their emotional masks. Lauren pulled him in for a deep passionate kiss. He was fully pressed against her. So _close_ to her, just one swift move and she’d feel all of him. Releasing from his desperate hold on her lips, Lauren's hands slid against his abs, scratching along the way until it met at his V. Her eyes of golden desire trained on him, never wavering as she spoke. 

“I want this. I want _you.”_

Breathing in hesitation, Kieran nodded to her, his arms fully supporting his body above her. He gripped the desk tightly with his left hand, letting the other fall along her thigh in a delicate tracing motion. It slid closer to her core and she gasped. Her thighs were drenched already, and much of his cock already covered with her desire for him. Lauren rocked her hips back and forth, adjusting beneath him, legs rising high over his arms. He leaned in, planting kisses upon her jaw, cheeks, and the corner of her lips. Kieran took his time fully meeting her and they began another dance of passion. Tongues lacing, teeth biting, lips pulling. He slowed his journey to a crawl, tasting all of her. His cock harder than it ever had been brushed along her entrance. A warm and cozy invite he was dying to accept. His hand reached for his member, lining it perfectly with her heated wet center. His name fell upon her whisper with a gentle moan. 

“Kieran…” 

That was all it took for him to thrust forward, burying himself deep inside of her in one swift movement. She was soaking. She was so _hot._ Wrapping around him like the burning sun. They both released an emotional gasp, joyous and pleasurable groans following soon after. He stayed there, connected with her in such a way he’d never felt. She too, didn’t move, only her hands rustling his fallen damp locks, foreheads pressed together and the erratic breathing they passed between one another. She nudged her hips but his hands came down to hold her there. He managed a whisper.

“Let me.”

He only asked her of this one thing. To embrace this moment and the moments they were about to create. Lauren bit her lip in anticipation, his slow thrusts, his movements coursing liquid heat between her legs. Lauren whimpered from his slow pace. His eyes stayed open, watching her, memorizing her, sketching her in his mind. _For later. I will no doubt draw this very moment._ Lauren’s eyes had closed, the feeling of him stretching her becoming too blissful to contain the flood of heat rising along her spine. Kieran moved his hips, finally pulling back and again slowly gliding along inside of her. He kept up the slow rhythm just to see her expressions. When she opened her eyes to him gazing down at her, something in her snapped. Or grew. Or became. Whatever it was, she couldn't think about it for long because he waited until now to pick up the pace. He wanted her to see him come apart. 

_He was going to prove it._

Kieran tugged her further off the desk, lifting her slightly and holding her hips in place. Kieran smirked at her and began his passionate assault. Lauren tried to keep her eyes on him but it was too much and she rolled her head back from the feeling. He started pounding into her at a faster pace. His hands gripped so tightly on her hips he was afraid she'd bruise. She was a goddess sprawled out like this. Tits bouncing at every vigorous motion when he slammed into her. He went deeper, lifting her up higher just like in the infirmary and riding her to the light. Lauren was a mess, moaning loudly and gripping at the edges of his desk. Speaking of the desk, he was pounding so deep inside of her they were shifting closer to the wall. 

_This was it. I was going to break my desk. After all this time. This is how she goes._

And how Lauren becomes untangled. His legs shook from the pleasure. From her coursing wet socket wrapped around his unfathomably hard cock. His mind wanted to fly away but his eyes couldn't let up on her serene glistening form laid out before him. He pulled out completely, receiving a pouting whimper but it lasted a second, Kieran pushing forward and driving so deep into her she yelped. He was leaning forward, sweat now dripping from his once damp hair. They were so close, their lips barely a brush away.

"I'm sorry. Did that hurt you?"

Lauren kissed him deeply, her tongue fighting his and they began a battle of assertion and dominance. When he pulled away she laughed. 

"No---you're fantastic. I can take your strength." 

He didn't move for a moment, planted tight and deep inside of her pussy, his arms shaky as they held onto her soft taut thighs. Lauren was about to speak but he stopped her, giving a simple peck on her lips. Her hands left the edges of his desk and slipped into his messy midnight locks. 

"That wasn't even a quarter of my strength. Are you sure you can handle me?" His suave and charm exuding from his naked body, lips curled into that lovable snarky smirk. It floored her. It sent her. She nodded in apprehension, wanting to be completely undone by the devil beneath the pale moonlight. 

His body was basked in the warm white of the midnight sun. He was almost like a dream. A very dark and delicious dream. Kieran rocked forward, the creak of the desk expressing its exhaustion. Lauren moaned with its sound, legs wrapping tightly around his hips and bringing him to her as if they were one. Kieran shook her from her element, his hands gripping underneath her thighs and lifting her up. She was suspended, carried off the desk and slammed against the wall. Lauren belted a dark laugh followed by a loud and naughty moan, the thrust of his cock pulsating deep inside of her as she hit the brick wall of the room.

"Well, Lauren Sinclair? How do you want me?"

His teeth bit her ear. Giving her gentle thrusts as she bounced on his cock, his rhythmic push grinding her against the wall. Kieran was incredibly strong. Stronger than she thought possible. 

"I want--" she was interrupted, Kieran humming with interest into her ear while his thrusts were deep and slow. She gave her retort. 

"If I had the choice I'd have you in handcuffs already." 

Kieran gave her a sexy laugh which fell off with his moans. He began to pick up his pace again. He was amazed she could hold him all. The drug made him thicker and larger, and equally as painful if no relief was given. The pressure was building but he wanted to make her cum more than once during this little fiasco. An animalistic nature took over him, speeding up and ruthlessly slamming into her against the wall. His forehead fell to hers and they kissed. He continued. She bit, she clawed, she squeezed. He licked, he nibbled, he caressed. He _loved._

"Ah! Kieran...right---there!" Lauren couldn't stop her gasps. Hands gripping his bare shoulders to keep steady. Just like her, he too was coming undone. The two of them in a cohesive bliss. Proving themselves or expressing their feelings, they didn't care anymore. The lust pulling them along in an ocean of ecstasy. _This_ was all they needed from the start to feel normal. To finally be able to think clearly. Despite all the muddled thoughts falling from their brains. The sparks alone gave them the light to guide them to the path of normalcy, and _this_ was more normal than their entire day. More natural than wallowing in the feeling of no relief. Equal stubbornness set aside, hatred pulled apart and reconnected to quantify the bond beneath their thick shells and high walls. For Kieran to humanize and Lauren, to rectify their deal, their partnership, their _friendship._

Her low lidded eyes found his and they continued this staring contest. She lowered her gaze, watching him drive her to bliss. His cock drenched in her lust as it slammed in and out of her. The coil burned, ready to snap. Her walls tightened around him, her mouth dry from the gasps of his name on her tongue. Kieran let out a low growl, biting her lower lip to get her attention. She lifted her gaze to him.

"Right here. Right now. You're mine." 

His taunt, his claim, reached out and captured her. He didn't flinch, or blink. Still lustfully gazing on into her soul. Lauren licked her lips with anticipation riding him hard, exhaustion setting in and his cock repeatedly pounding into that sweet spot. 

“Kieran. You’re gonna make me--” 

Lauren was breathing so heavy now she couldn’t manage words. 

“I’m going to cum! Kieran!!!” 

She cried out his name louder than she ever had. Than she ever would possibly. Her hands found his hair, tugging hard. Her reins. Her tether. Her hold on reality. The coil, it snapped and he held her there so she wouldn't glide away into the light guided by the sparks. He whispered sweet nothings to her as she released, tightening and cumming over his cock in waves. Her juices couldn't manage, falling along her thighs. The slapping of their skin damp with their love making. Lauren breathed out in exhaustion, but Kieran didn’t let up. Slowing his pace but still going strong. She moaned again, that tight spring winding up once again inside of her. 

_How long would he go for? Would he do this all night?_

Every time his sweet lips would reach her ears she was sure he was going to say something, but he’d stop himself, instead chanting her name or whispering to her every dirty thought in his mind. But she knew there was something more he wanted to say. Kieran was definitely exhausted, that she could tell. From the endless torture of the day and his inablity to sleep after the return from the Grim Goblin, but he never let it show. He held her there with his biceps, his hips keeping the steady rhythm and his breath controlled, almost like he was in a trance. His eyes had finally closed, completely melting into her essence. They went on like this for minutes, neither speaking, only hot gasps, fleeting moans, and gentle pushes of their lips coming together to express how much they both wanted this. 

Kieran was starting to realize, this wasn’t a _fling._ He never fucked someone this way before. He never cared long enough, never bothered to wonder if the other was even feeling just as good as he was. His heart fluttered, opening his eyes from his trance to watch the red locks bounce upon her face. The way her mouth fell open at every pump of his cock into her. How her eyes would squeeze shut but her brows would lift, entranced into utter bliss. 

He was making _love_ to her. 

Opening his heart, baring his soul.

He was proving to her the only _human_ qualities he had left. 

And they were _hers_ for the taking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a monster of a chapter, and I left it as a cliffhanger totally on purpose because I have so many ideas I still need to write out and it would end up being over 15k words for one chapter alone if I kept going. Lauki has the whole night ahead of them, so don't worry, next chapter is going to have spice from the get-go. It'll start right where this one left off, and things are going to get...daring. 
> 
> I want to give a shout out to everyone here and on the discord for motivation, the words, the feedback, and inspiration. The many ideas that have fallen into this chapter alone were once just one-shots and now incorporated. I want to give special thanks to Mery who's been a big support with this and ideas, as well as feeding into my chaotic brain cell. I also want to give credit to Sam (Instagram @ethqrval), who came up with this brilliant idea of Kieran using colors & paint at one time but no longer does because he's so fucked up. His world is bleak with grey, black and white. (Until Lauren comes into his life, then he begins to see some color again) *sobs*
> 
> P.S Kieran x Zephyr (YEEE BOII)
> 
> Kieran scribbling down on a piece of paper after this is all over.  
>  Note to self, aphrodisiacs and Lauren combined are terrifying. Never again. 


End file.
